IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The chart below gives information about the UK's ageing population in 1985 and makes predictions for 2035. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

The chart below gives information about the UK's ageing population in 1985 and makes predictions for 2035. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.
#information #uk #population #predictions #features #comparisons
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The picture given above depicts a bar chart illustrating
proportions
Correct article usage
the proportions
show examples
 of
old
Correct article usage
the old
show examples
 people's
population
Use synonyms
 in five
state
Change to a plural noun
states
show examples
 of
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 in 1985 and 2035.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, Wales had the highest percentage of
elderlys
Correct your spelling
elderly
, over one-fourth of its
population
Use synonyms
.
Although
Linking Words
 the predictions foretell that compared to other areas, it will keep its position among states,
this
Linking Words
 proportion will drop to 15%. Scatland's 65 and over
population
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
 will fall. As 25% of
Scottish
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the Scottish
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 nation was constituted by old people, it will
plung
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plunge
plug
 to under 14
percent
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per cent
show examples
 in 2035. In the UK and Northern Ireland
as well as
Linking Words
 England, nearly the same percentage of
Use synonyms
population
Add an article
the population
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were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
 made up by
this
Linking Words
 age group,
approximatly
Correct your spelling
approximately
 23%.
Besides
Linking Words
, for both England and
Correct article usage
the Uk
show examples
Uk
Correct your spelling
UK
show examples
, the reduction in the proportion of
this
Linking Words
 age group will be the same, with almost 8% reduction, it may be 15%.
Whearas
Correct your spelling
Whereas
, it is possible that Northern Ireland might
experince
Correct your spelling
experience
 a
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
cut in the percentage of the
elderlys
Correct your spelling
elderly
. it would be slightly more than 10%.
Overall
Linking Words
, the percentages of the age category will decrease in all states, but North
Ireand
Correct your spelling
Ireland
 may see the highest rate of reduction.
Submitted by faraisam33 on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words population with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportions" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reduction" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Ageing population
  • Demographics
  • Percentage
  • Increase/Decrease
  • Predictions
  • Proportion
  • Region/Regional
  • Statistics
  • Gradual change
  • Elderly
  • Life expectancy
  • Healthcare
  • Birth rate
  • Comparative analysis
  • Trend
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