IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below gives information about how families in one country spent their weekly income in 1968 and in 2018

The chart below gives information about how families in one country spent their weekly income in 1968 and in 2018
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The bar chart compares the weekly budgeting of families from a particular country in 1968 and in 2018. The numbers show the percentage of weekly income they spend on each group. At first sight, 3 groups experienced an increase in budgeting; housing increased from 10% to 19%, transport grew from around 8% to 14%, and leisure surged from about 9% to 23%, becoming the most invested class in 2018.
On the other hand
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, 4 groups saw a decrease in priority throughout the period. With people having to spend the most on food at 35% to only roughly 17%, power and clothing fall respectively from 6% to 4% and more or less 10% to 5%. The masses
also
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 pay less for personal goods, from 8% to only 4%.
However
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, there is one necessity that hasn't changed throughout the years– household goods, sitting still at approximately 8%.
To conclude
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, the spending of citizens today has become more diversified

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Weekly income
  • Expenditure
  • Consumption patterns
  • Cost of living
  • Discretionary spending
  • Inflation
  • Economic indicators
  • Demographics
  • Socio-economic factors
  • Technology advancements
  • Government policies
  • Consumerism
  • Lifestyle changes
  • Fiscal habits
  • Budget allocation
  • Financial priorities
  • Societal trends
  • Purchasing power
  • Income distribution
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