IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Many people are choosing to live on their own. Is this a positive or a negative trend?What is your opinion and share your personal experiences? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Nowadays,
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the
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a
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the
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 word artificial intelligence is in trend commonly known as AI. It prefers to a
software
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 designed by humans. once an a.i
software
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 is developed , It can answer
to
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apply
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various questions and can do various tasks using its algorithm set by humans. Many people think that development in
AI
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the AI
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 sector could be very beneficial. I will elaborate on it in
further
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 paragraphs and give my opinion on
this
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 topic.
To begin
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 with, artificial intelligence was first introduced by Sir John Edward in 1990. It was first used in a calculator to calculate complex calculations. from that time period, It has developed a lot.
For instance
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, one can make a short animation movie using AI on just a mobile by providing specific information. It
have
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has
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 reduced a lot of work and pressure on people especially in
computer
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the computer
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 field as much of the work is done using AI.
Furthermore
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, there are many things which can be done by AI, but
due to
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lack
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a lack
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 of technology and advancement in
AI
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the AI
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 sector, they are not possible as of now.
On the other hand
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, there are
also
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 some
drawback
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drawbacks
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 of a
for example
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, it can be corrupt or can be hacked as it is just
a
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apply
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software
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.
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furthermore
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furthermore,
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 a million or even
billion dollar
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billion-dollar
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 scam can be done if a bank is using
ai
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a
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software
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 for the transition of money by using just a computer.
Moreover
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, if AI
software
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 is used in machines with
weapon
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weapons
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, It can even prove to be a danger
for
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to
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 humanity. In conclusion,
According to
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 me development in AI would
be
Verb problem
have
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 a positive impact on our
life
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lives
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 and can help in the development of large upcoming
project
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projects
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 as it
reduce
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reduces
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the
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apply
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most of the work.

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coherence cohesion
Improve cohesion by ensuring smoother transitions between paragraphs. For instance, the shift from supporting AI's benefits to discussing its drawbacks could be more seamless.
task achievement
Provide more detailed examples or anecdotes to support your points and make your arguments more convincing.
task achievement
Ensure that all parts of the task are answered thoroughly, including a deeper reflection on personal experiences related to AI.
introduction conclusion present
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps to frame the topic effectively.
complete response
You have made a good attempt to introduce and discuss both the advantages and disadvantages of AI, showing a balanced perspective.
relevant specific examples
You have used historical context effectively by mentioning the introduction of AI by Sir John Edward.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • self-reliance
  • personal growth
  • privacy
  • personal space
  • financial burden
  • cost-sharing
  • loneliness
  • isolation
  • flexibility
  • freedom
  • safety risks
  • elderly individuals
  • health issues
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