With the rise of social media, an increasing number of young people are being granted unsupervised internet access to interact and chat with friends. This situation can potentially lead to dangerous scenarios. What solutions can be proposed to address this issue?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Improving
of
Remove the preposition
apply
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social media allowed many teenagers to
unsupervised
Add a missing verb
have unsupervised
show examples
access to the internet
fot
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for
meeting and
chating
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chatting
with friends which can lead to
potentially
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potential
show examples
situations.
This
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problem can be solved by parental
contoal
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control
and
school
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education.
Firstly
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, the effective solution that can be
implememnted
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implemented
to overcome
this
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issue
Use synonyms
is that
parents
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should know the
risk
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risks
show examples
,
it
Correct pronoun usage
that
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may come from
this
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addiction
of
Change preposition
to
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social media to control their
childern
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children
.
In other words
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, protecting them by
contoroling
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controlling
usege
to
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of
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their mobile
as well as
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observing which apps
their
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
uses
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use
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to
avoied
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avoid
them from
this
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issue
Use synonyms
,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
may lead them to health
Use synonyms
issue
Fix the agreement mistake
issues
show examples
as well.
For example
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, there are some apps
especially
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, especially
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for
this
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which
parents
Use synonyms
can
been controalled
Wrong verb form
control
show examples
their mobile,
Moreover
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, they can put
Add an article
a limit
show examples
limit
Fix the agreement mistake
limits
show examples
for
Change preposition
on
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usege
Correct your spelling
usage
.
As a result
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,
this
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will reduce some of
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this
Fix the agreement mistake
these issues
show examples
issue
Use synonyms
if
parents
Use synonyms
take action in order to protect their
childern
Correct your spelling
children
. Because
nowaday
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nowadays
show examples
we are facing enormous
technology
Replace the word
technological
show examples
development in our life.
Secondly
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,
this
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conundurm
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conundrum
also
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can
Verb problem
apply
show examples
be tackled if they get some
knowlged
Correct your spelling
knowledge
knowledged
about the
harmfull
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harm
from their
school
Use synonyms
, they will
sence
Correct your spelling
sense
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
effect
Fix the agreement mistake
effects
show examples
may
Correct pronoun usage
that may
show examples
come from using
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
so much.
This
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to
Add a missing verb
is to
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say, schools have to educate them by teaching
how
Correct pronoun usage
them how
show examples
to deal with new technology and
avoied addication
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avoid addiction
. For
intenste
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instance
, by doing some
activets
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activities
or events for
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
good way to use mobile
such
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as making
compation
Correct your spelling
competition
among students,
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
they will gain
knowlege
Correct your spelling
knowledge
to
controal
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control
themself.
Thus
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, if schools did more courses for the
harmfull
Correct your spelling
harmful
,they would improve their
studentds
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students
student's
perfoemance
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performance
in order to avoid any problem in sie
school
Use synonyms
.
To sum up
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, In order to
avoid
Verb problem
prevent
show examples
youngsters from
unspervised
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unsupervised
access to the internet,
controaling
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controlling
their
parents
Use synonyms
and educating them
form
Correct your spelling
from
show examples
school
Use synonyms
are effective.
Submitted by s_syedy on

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coherence cohesion
Try to ensure the introduction clearly outlines both the issue and the proposed solutions with more clarity.
task achievement
Improve sentence structure and grammar to make your ideas clearer and more comprehensible.
task achievement
The essay provides ideas for both parental control and school education as solutions to the problem.
coherence cohesion
There is a conclusion summarizing the main points.
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