Some people think that universities should provide graduates with the knowledge and skills needed in the workplace. Others think that the true function of a university should be to give access to knowledge for its own sake, regardless of whether the course is useful to an employer. What, in your opinion, should be the main function of a university?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Universities
work
Verb problem
do
show examples
an excellent job
to prepare
Change preposition
of preparing
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
students for their future professions. Some believe that
main
Correct article usage
the main
show examples
focus of graduate schools should be on providing the abilities and knowledge in a professional place,
however
, others hold the idea the other parts of knowledge are more important to concentrate on. The first view is more in line with my opinion even though
these educations
Fix the agreement mistake
this education
show examples
should include both practical and holistic aspects.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
the one hand,
universities
should prioritize providing students with applicable
skills
that meet the demands of the job market.
For example
, offering practical training, internships, and courses that teach industry-specific competencies. With
this
approach, the
new
Change the adjective
newly
show examples
graduated
ones
have
less thing
Fix the agreement mistake
fewer things
show examples
to worry about and are more confident to apply for new opportunities down the road.
On the other hand
, it is not wise to just only pay attention to practical
skills
and ignore the holistic
ones
. In
this
era, many companies are looking for
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
fresh mind with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
highly
emotional
Change the word
emotionally
show examples
intelligent
skills
such
as critical thinking, creativity,
communications
Fix the agreement mistake
communication
show examples
, and ethics which
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
essential and valuable expertise for both personal and professional life. So, it would be advised to
offering
Wrong verb form
offer
show examples
courses and simulations for practicing and learning those
ones
in the
universities
too. In
summarize
Replace the word
summary
show examples
, I think it would be more practical for
universities
to not only work on the applicable
skills
of students
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but
also
on their holistic
ones
for a better career and life after graduation.
Submitted by mh.emrani on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, but make sure that these parts are more closely aligned. For example, reiterate your thesis statement more directly in the conclusion.
task achievement
Strengthen your argument by supporting your main points with more specific examples and evidence. This will help enhance the clarity and depth of your response.
task achievement
Your ideas are generally clear, but there are some instances where the language could be more precise. Try to avoid vague terms and be more specific in your explanations.
task achievement
Your essay adequately addresses the prompt by discussing both sides of the argument and providing your viewpoint.
coherence cohesion
The overall structure of your essay is logical, with distinct sections for introduction, body, and conclusion.
task achievement
You acknowledge the importance of both practical and holistic education, which adds depth to your discussion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Lifelong learning
  • Holistic development
  • Vocational training
  • Industry-specific competencies
  • Critical thinking
  • Creative problem-solving
  • Academic research
  • Intellectual development
  • Ethics and values
  • Societal contribution
  • Job market demands
  • Practical training
  • Internships
  • Knowledge advancement
  • Global challenges
What to do next:
Look at other essays: