IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people believe that free housing should be provided by the government for under-privileged and people who can’t afford to buy a house. To what extent do you agree and disagree with the statement? Give examples based on your own experience.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In
this
Linking Words
 era, most
families
Use synonyms
 realize that free housing must be provided by the
government
Use synonyms
 for poor
families
Use synonyms
 and
families
Use synonyms
 who can not afford to buy a
house
Use synonyms
.
this
Linking Words
 is
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 interesting topic. I really concur with
this
Linking Words
 statement. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will provide some arguments on the matter. Nowadays, some
societies
Use synonyms
 feel that the
government
Use synonyms
 must give free housing to low-income
societies
Use synonyms
 and
people
Use synonyms
 who do not have enough to purchase a
house
Use synonyms
.
this
Linking Words
 is because there are a
lot
Use synonyms
 of factors that influence
this
Linking Words
 phenomenon.
Firstly
Linking Words
, In
this
Linking Words
country
Use synonyms
, there are many
people
Use synonyms
 who do not have a
house
Use synonyms
. The
government
Use synonyms
 must take action to overcome
this
Linking Words
problem
Use synonyms
.
Use synonyms
Government
Correct article usage
The government
show examples
 can reduce
this
Linking Words
problem
Use synonyms
 by providing subsidized housing for underprivileged
people
Use synonyms
. By doing so,
government
Use synonyms
 can reduce poverty levels and enhance the welfare of
societies
Use synonyms
. So, the
government
Use synonyms
 must provide subsidized housing for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
poor
people
Use synonyms
 to reduce poverty levels in
this
Linking Words
country
Use synonyms
.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
country
Use synonyms
 is still a developing state. there are a
lot
Use synonyms
 of
societies
Use synonyms
 that do not have a
job
Use synonyms
.
government
Use synonyms
 must provide a
lot
Use synonyms
 of
job
Use synonyms
 opportunities to those who are still unemployed to reduce
this
Linking Words
problem
Use synonyms
.
besides
Linking Words
 that, the
government
Use synonyms
 can give some free training to increase their skills.
Therefore
Linking Words
, to address unemployment and improve the well-being of citizens, the
government
Use synonyms
 must take proactive steps. By providing more
job
Use synonyms
 opportunities and offering free training programs, the
government
Use synonyms
 can help reduce unemployment rates and enhance the skills of the workforce, ultimately contributing to the
country
Use synonyms
's development. In conclusion, in
this
Linking Words
 contemporary era, some
families
Use synonyms
 think that
Use synonyms
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 must provide free housing for destitute
societies
Use synonyms
 and
people
Use synonyms
 who
can
Verb problem
do
show examples
 not have enough to buy a
house
Use synonyms
.
this
Linking Words
 is because there are a
lot
Use synonyms
 of factors that influence
this
Linking Words
 phenomenon.
Firstly
Linking Words
, In
this
Linking Words
country
Use synonyms
, there are many
people
Use synonyms
 who can not buy a
house
Use synonyms
.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
country
Use synonyms
 is still a developing state. there are a
lot
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 who do not have a
job
Use synonyms
.
government
Use synonyms
 must take action to overcome
this
Linking Words
problem
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

introduction conclusion present
Your essay has a generally clear introduction and conclusion. However, make sure to maintain consistency in capitalization and formal tone throughout the essay, such as capitalizing the beginning of each sentence and ensuring that important terms, like 'government,' are consistent.
relevant specific examples
When discussing examples, try to incorporate more specific examples that either draw on known facts or hypothetical scenarios to illustrate your points more vividly. This will strengthen the task response and make your arguments more compelling.
logical structure
While the logical structure is fairly clear, you can improve coherence by using more linking words and phrases, such as 'moreover,' 'in addition,' and 'consequently,' to connect your ideas and paragraphs more smoothly.
introduction conclusion present
The essay introduction clearly outlines the main issue and indicates the writer’s stance, which helps set the stage for the reader.
complete response
The essay presents well-founded arguments that address multiple facets of the housing issue, showing thoughtful analysis of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: