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Writing Samples
Band 5

In many countries, formal exams are used to assess students’ abilities and judge the success of their education. What are the advantages and disadvantages of using formal exams to assess students’ abilities? Do you think the benefits outweigh the drawbacks?

Assessing
students
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' capability for academic success
by
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through
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exams
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 is the most
method
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common method
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 that many countries around the world. I believe that the reliance only on
exams
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 does not determine
students
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' ability to be successful learners.
Exams
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 are assessing
tool
Fix the agreement mistake
tools
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 for
teachers
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' performance, and judging
students
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 only by
exams
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 is
unjustice
Correct your spelling
injustice
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.
Students
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' evaluation should based on other factors,
such
Linking Words
 as their personalities, whether they are
discipline
Wrong verb form
disciplined
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 or not, and
also
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 their commitment. Depending only on
exams
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 to predict
students
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’ academic success
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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could be unfair, when
students
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 are not
interesting
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interested
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 in subjects.
Also
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 when they do not study well before
exams
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due to
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 some circumstances,
such
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 as illness, so they will achieve low marks.
For example
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, some learners feel anxious during
exams
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, and
this
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 will affect their
focusing
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focus
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while
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 they are studying. Unfortunately,
this
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 will be reflected
on
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in
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 their results.
On the other hand
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,
exams
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 are
considering
Wrong verb form
considered
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 a standardized way to evaluate
teachers
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 themselves,
besides
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students
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’ performance and assessing their performance level by responsible authorities. It can give
general
Correct article usage
a general
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 view by counting
number
Change the article
a number
the number
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 of failed and successful
students
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, if the number of
students
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 who
are
Verb problem
have
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 achieved
high
Correct article usage
a high
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 degree rose,
that
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is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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mean
Replace the word
means
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teachers
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' capability for explanation is good.
Furthermore
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,
exams
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 are helping
students
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 to dry studying in
systematic
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a systematic
show examples
 way and organizing their ideas.
For instance
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, some countries tend to exclude
teachers
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 if there is
huge
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a huge
the huge
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 number of
students
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Correct pronoun usage
who did
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did
Wrong verb form
do
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 not pass
exams
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, they
are assuming
Wrong verb form
assume
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 the problem
related
Add a missing verb
is related
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 to
teachers
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. In conclusion, I believe that
exams
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 are a good way to ensure the assessment of
students
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’ understanding, but it is not an appropriate manner to evaluate
students
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. There are many things
could
Correct pronoun usage
that could
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 control their educational success,
such
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like
Change preposition
as
show examples
 personal skills.
Also
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, governments can
be knowing
Wrong verb form
know
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Use synonyms
teachers
Change noun form
teachers'
teacher's
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 efficiency by
Use synonyms
exams
Change the noun form
exam
show examples
 results.

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task achievement
To improve task achievement, ensure that you address all parts of the question thoroughly and provide a balanced discussion of both advantages and disadvantages, as well as a clear opinion about whether the benefits outweigh the drawbacks.
coherence cohesion
Enhance coherence and cohesion by organizing your arguments more logically and using clearer transitions between points. This helps the reader follow your ideas more easily.
task achievement
Add more specific examples or data to support your points. This will not only strengthen your arguments but also demonstrate your understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps set the context and wrap up the discussion effectively.
task achievement
You have made a good attempt at discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of formal exams, indicating an effort towards a balanced argument.
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