There is a problem with the changing rooms in the sports center that you visit. You have complained several times but with no success. Write a letter to the manager of the sports center. In your letter: • Describe what the problem with the changing rooms is • Say what happened the last times you complained • Explain what you want the manager to do

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Dear Sir, I hope
this
letter finds you well. I am a member of the sports
center
Change the spelling
centre
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and using
this
facility for the
last
three years. I am writing
this
letter to express my dissatisfaction with the water heating systems installed in the men's changing room of the facility as it
is
Verb problem
has
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not working for the past
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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week. Owing to
it
Correct pronoun usage
this
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, members are using cold water to take
shower
Fix the agreement mistake
showers
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. I complained about it
last
month
also
, because
then
also
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apply
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it suddenly stopped working.
Then
a technician visited the facility and checked the system thoroughly and repaired it, but he advised to replace it with a new one.
However
, nothing was done to buy
a new heating equipment
Remove the article
new heating equipment
a piece of new heating equipment
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, because it started working normally after the repair job. I would urge you to kindly purchase
new
Correct article usage
a new
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heating system
,
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apply
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because
winter
Correct article usage
the winter
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season is going on and it becomes difficult to use cold water for bathing. I hope you will look into the matter and take
necessary
Correct article usage
the necessary
show examples
steps to resolve the issue. I am looking forward to hearing from you. Yours faithfully, Jatinder.
Submitted by mrsdns on

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task achievement
Your letter clearly communicated the problem, past attempts to resolve it, and a call to action. Ensure to include more specific details about how the issue affects you personally to enhance engagement.
coherence cohesion
Try to connect ideas with linking words slightly more, for smooth transitions. However, the logical flow of the letter is already quite commendable.
complete response
The letter effectively addresses all necessary points: the issue, past complaints, and the desired action.
suitable writing tone
The tone of the letter is polite and formal, fitting for a letter to a manager.
greeting and closing
The structure of the letter, including a proper greeting and closing, conforms to a formal letter layout.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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