Some people think that the teenage years are the happiest time of most people’s lives. Others think that adult life brings more happiness, in spite of greater responsibility. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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It is often believed that the adolescent era is the most unforgettable and joyful day

Change preposition

for

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every individual.Others would

also

Linking Words

perceive that being an adult is more enjoyable despite a lot of obligations and demands in

life

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss both opinions and explain which stage of every human development is more enjoyable & memorable. On one hand, some people believe that the teenage years are one of the most joyous and happiest times of growth.Because

being

Unnecessary verb

apply

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teenager

Fix the agreement mistake

teenagers

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there are

Verb problem

have

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fewer responsibilities compared to adults which gives them ample

hour

Fix the agreement mistake

hours

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to enjoy

life

Use synonyms

For example

Linking Words

, teenagers are enjoying their leisure

hour

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hours

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hanging out with friends and classmates .

Also

Linking Words

, they try different types of adventures and new hobbies without any hesitation in paying monthly bills and working full-time.

Moreover

Linking Words

, during

this

Linking Words

point of

life

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, people are full of curiosity, energy and excitement which makes their experiences in

life

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more enjoyable.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, adulthood is the most

self fulfilling

Add a hyphen

self-fulfilling

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moment of every human ,even though there are a lot of demands and responsibilities.Adults have the ability to make important decisions ,

such

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as choosing their career ,building a family or following their dreams.These choices could lead to a more meaningful activity.

For example

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, having children and achieving success in the field of profession brings a sense of pride and happiness.

Additionally

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, adults are more confident and. mature when it comes to decision-making, which helps them appreciate

life

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better. In my own perspective,

while

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teenage years are fun and carefree, youth brings more long-term happiness. In conclusion, both teenage years and adulthood offer different kinds of happiness.

However

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, I believe that personal growth and accomplishments in adulthood make it the happier stage of

life

Use synonyms

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Coherence and Cohesion

Improve logical connections between paragraphs to enhance coherence.

Task Achievement

Ensure examples directly support the main points and are more specific.

Task Achievement

Work on developing ideas more comprehensively for clarity.

Coherence and Cohesion

A clear introduction and conclusion are present, providing a good structure to the essay.

Task Achievement

The essay addresses both perspectives, demonstrating understanding of the task.

Task Achievement

The expression of personal opinion is clear and contributes to the discussion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

282 words

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Some people think that the teenage years are the happiest time of most people’s lives. Others think that adult life brings more happiness, in spite of greater responsibility. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people focus on national news, while others think it is more important to be aware of international news. Discuss both views and offer your opinion

Some people think that social networking sites have a huge negative impact on both individuals and society.

Some people think that it is better to educate boys and girls in separate schools. Others, however, believe that boys and girls benefit more from attending mixed schools. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Experts claim that if older people do more exercise they will be healthier and happier. However, many elderly people suffer from a lack of fitness. What are the causes of this and what are some possible solutions?

Economic growth is one way to measure a country's success, but what else should we look at? Which do you think is the most important?