Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
With the
development
of technology, access to electronic devices has become an unavoidable fact. Among all these devices, smartphone
plays a major role. Unlike years ago, nowadays not only adultsAdd an article
the smartphone
,
but Remove the comma
apply
also
children
has
Change the verb form
have
the
access to mobiles. Correct article usage
apply
Use
of mobile phones among Correct article usage
The use
children
has a positive as well as
negative impact on their development
. This
essay discusses about
the above in detail.
The Remove the preposition
apply
development
a
Change preposition
of a
child
can have a positive impact due to
the use
of mobile phones. In today's contemporary society, both parents play the role of the bread winner
in their families meanwhile, most of the Correct your spelling
breadwinner
time
children
are left in a daycare or with some adults. However
, the use
of mobile can help children
to use
their parentless time
meaningfully by providing educational support. For
example
, a primary student can improve his basis
language and mathematical skills by playing some apps which can be installed Replace the word
basic
in
the phone. Change preposition
on
Similarly
, even a toddler is capable of handling these devices at such
a young age. Although
this
must be occurred
under the guidance of a parent or a guardian, they tend to grab the concept and methods of the mobile easily. Change to the active voice
occur
have occurred
This
can develop their thinking capacity. As an example
, apps such
as ABCmouse, Peek-a-zoo and Speech blubs
are capable of improving the toddler's cognitive capacity Capitalize word
Blubs
as well as
speaking ability.
However
, just as a coin has two sides, not only positive, but there can have
a negative Verb problem
be
development
of a child
due to
the use
of mobile. One major issue a child
could have is health related
problems. Lack of physical Add a hyphen
health-related
exercises
and social interactions Fix the agreement mistake
exercise
due to
mobile addiction can lead to obesity and social isolation. As a result
, a child
can ended
up non-sociable and unhealthy. For Change the verb form
end
be ended
an
Correct article usage
apply
example
, a boy who used to spend most of his time
on screen would not have much
friends to communicate his feelings and Change the quantifier
many
as a
result
even can be ended having anxiety and depression. At the same Add a comma
result,
time
, massive screen time
can disturb the eye sight
of a Correct your spelling
eyesight
child
. According to
the
scientists, the light which sparks from mobiles Correct article usage
apply
are
Change the verb form
is
toxicated
to the eyes. That can reduce Correct your spelling
toxic
the
vision and even Correct article usage
apply
can
damage the eye in Verb problem
apply
long
term. For Correct article usage
the long
an
Correct article usage
apply
example
, a child
who is addicted to the phone will have many difficulties in school work especially copying notes from board
meanwhile others could.
In conclusion, in Correct article usage
the board
this
technical era, it is inevitable to distance a child
from mobiles. Overall
, since there are many positives and negatives, it is advisable to
Change preposition
for
children
to use
them in balance for their own betterment.Submitted by batsathsarani on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph focuses on a single idea and is fully developed with explanations and examples. At times, points seemed blended, affecting clarity.
task achievement
Provide clearer arguments, especially when distinguishing between positive and negative impacts. Each argument should directly relate to the central question.
task achievement
Incorporate more specific examples and data to strengthen arguments. Use evidence to further clarify points made.
task achievement
The essay clearly identifies the dual nature of smartphone use in children, covering both positive and negative aspects.
coherence cohesion
There's a recognizable structure with an introduction that sets up the discussion and a conclusion that summarizes the key points effectively.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?