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Writing Samples
Band 7

The line graph below shows who Americans spend their time with, by age. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The line graph below shows who Americans spend their time with, by age. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The diagram displays the information about the US Citizens spend their
time
Use synonyms
 based on many
hours
Use synonyms
 from 20 to over 80
years
Use synonyms
 old.
Overall
Linking Words
, the majority of people spend their
time
Use synonyms
 alone and the lowest ratio
at the end
Linking Words
 of the period is with
coworkers
Use synonyms
. At the early age from 20 to 30
years
Use synonyms
 old, the
time
Use synonyms
 with their family fell off significantly from 4
hours
Use synonyms
 to nearly 1 hour and after that followed by friends.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
coworkers
Use synonyms
, partners, children and alone are starting to increase gradually, where personal
time
Use synonyms
 started with the biggest in over 3
hours
Use synonyms
. In the period 30 to 40
years
Use synonyms
 old, alone and children sides share the same values at approximately 4
hours
Use synonyms
.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, partners and
coworkers
Use synonyms
 had stagnant stages
while
Linking Words
 taking
time
Use synonyms
 with family and friends being the smallest.
However
Linking Words
, at the stage of 50
years
Use synonyms
 old, the moment with children and
coworkers
Use synonyms
 slowly decreased. In the end, living alone had the biggest
hours
Use synonyms
 at 8
hours
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
 the other categories only enjoyed by each other not over than 3
hours
Use synonyms
.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words time, hours, years, coworkers with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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