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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The chart below shows the proportions of adults in Canada who own one car, two cars, more than two cars, or who do not own a car.

The chart below shows the proportions of adults in Canada who own one car, two cars, more than two cars, or who do not own a car.
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In the
Change preposition
The
show examples
 above pie chart
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
shows the proportions of
adults
Use synonyms
 in Canada who own one
car
Use synonyms
 ,
two
Use synonyms
cars
Use synonyms
 , more than
two
Use synonyms
cars
Use synonyms
 , or who do not own a
car
Use synonyms
 . There are four proportions in
this
Linking Words
 chart and the highest percentage is
adults
Use synonyms
 who have one
car
Use synonyms
 which
represent
Change the verb form
represents
show examples
 more than 50%.
Secondly
Linking Words
, the
owner
Fix the agreement mistake
owners
show examples
 of
two
Use synonyms
vehicless
Correct your spelling
vehicles
get
Change the verb form
gets
show examples
second
Add an article
a second
show examples
 place
around
Change preposition
at around
show examples
 30%.
On the other hand
Linking Words
 , the shocking information is that a large number of
adults
Use synonyms
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
did not own a
car
Use synonyms
 .
Lastly
Linking Words
, More than
two
Use synonyms
cars
Use synonyms
 get the lowest percentage around 10%. In conclusion , The highest percentage of
adults
Use synonyms
 in Canada who own one vehicle and the
last
Linking Words
 place goes to
adults
Use synonyms
 who have more than
two
Use synonyms
cars
Use synonyms
.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 90%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words adults, car, two, cars with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "proportions" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportions" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Proportion
  • Percentage
  • Ownership
  • Trend
  • Urban
  • Rural
  • Public transportation
  • Environmental impact
  • Government policies
  • Subsidy
  • Electric cars
  • Cultural attitudes
  • Income level
  • Economic factors
  • Technological advancement
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