Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#people #music #cultures #ages

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It is often argued that

music

Use synonyms

has

Correct article usage

the

show examples

power of bringing

people

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from other

nations

Use synonyms

and ages together. I strongly agree with the statement because every culture

hast

Correct your spelling

has

show examples

its own

music

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style and each decade has

different

Add an article

a different

show examples

style of

music

Use synonyms

To begin

Linking Words

, every

Use synonyms

nations

Change to a singular noun

nation

show examples

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

different

Add an article

a different

show examples

culture.Because of

that

Add a comma

that,

show examples

there are so many genres of

music

Use synonyms

all around the world.To elaborate, in

United

Correct article usage

the United

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States rock and roll

music

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is really popular.

However

Linking Words

, in

Correct article usage

the middle

show examples

middle east

Correct your spelling

Middle East

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arabesque kind of

music

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is chosen by

majority

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the majority

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. Namely,

music

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kinds are different

all

Change preposition

in all

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parts of the globe.

Moreover

Linking Words

, some individuals are curious about different

music

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styles.

For example

Linking Words

music

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festivals

are taking

Wrong verb form

take

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place nearly every year and many

people

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find these activities beneficial because they can

achieve

Verb problem

acquire

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knowledge about rare and different cultural

musics

Change the wording

music

kinds of music

pieces of music

show examples

from other

nations

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Also

Linking Words

, every decade has its own

music

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that

goes

Verb problem

becomes

show examples

popular

Change preposition

for approximative

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approximative

Replace the word

approximately

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all 10 years. To elaborate, in 80

’s

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ock

Correct your spelling

rock

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music

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was really popular at that time.

However

Linking Words

, Now it is listened

Change preposition

to by

show examples

middle-aged and elderly

people

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Because nowadays

Correct word choice

Nowadays

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rap

music

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is chosen by

majority

Add an article

a majority

the majority

show examples

people

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. In spite of these

changes

Add a comma

changes,

show examples

many

music

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bands broke up.

For

Linking Words

example

Add a comma

example,

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Queen was

really

Add an article

a really

show examples

popular rock band in

Correct article usage

the 70’s

show examples

Fix apostrophe usage

’70s

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’s

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and

Fix apostrophe usage

’80s

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’s

Use synonyms

However

Linking Words

in the beginning of 90

’s

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the band broke up because they lost interest. In conclusion,

music

Use synonyms

has

Correct article usage

the

show examples

power

of bonding

Change preposition

to bond

show examples

other

nations

Use synonyms

and ages together. Because there

Change the verb form

are

show examples

different genres of

music

Use synonyms

all around the world and every 10

year

Change to a plural noun

years

show examples

the popular

music

Use synonyms

style gets changed. Not

last

Linking Words

but

also

Linking Words

, I think

music

Use synonyms

has

Verb problem

show examples

a strong factor

for

Change preposition

show examples

bringing other nationalities and ages together

Submitted by mcqueensever on Mon Dec 16 2024

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
34
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

265 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

universal language
evoke
connect
diverse audiences
cultural exchange
generational gaps
shared experiences
unifying force

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Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

In many countries large amounts of foods are wasted. Why do you think people waste food in this way? What can be done to reduce the amount of food thrown away? (rewrite)

As the internet becomes more popular, newspapers are becoming a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Children have more and more tests and exams to do at school, sometimes starting from the age of five or six, right up until the age of 18. What are the advantages and disadvantages of making children do exams?

Traffic abd housing problems in major cities could be solved by moving large companies and factories andtheir employees to the country side. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this opinion?