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Writing Samples
Band 5

Nowadays many people complain that they have difficulties getting enough sleep. What problem can lack of sleep cause? What can be done about lack of sleep?

Sleep deprivation has become an increasingly modern issue in today's world.
This
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 essay will explore both
problems
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which are
Verb problem
that
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resulted
Wrong verb form
result
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 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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less
amount
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 of sleep
time
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 and possible solutions to
lack
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 of sleep. There might be many
problems
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 which can be caused by less sleep times. One of which is mental health
problems
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. Some
people
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 suffer from making decisions and doing the right work during the day. Since they do not sleep enough.
For instance
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, there was a study
which did
Wrong verb form
done
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 between two groups of
people
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, and
people
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 who have
lack
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 of sleep could not complete mathematical tasks,
while
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people
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 who
have
Wrong verb form
had
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an
Remove the article
apply
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enough
amount
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 of sleep
time
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 performed the best grades. The students who could not perform
task
Add an article
the task
show examples
 were struggling with deciding between correct and incorrect answers.
Therefore
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, sleep is
also
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 crucial for mental health
Moreover
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,
lack
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 of sleep makes
people
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 nervous, as they cannot relax during
night
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the night
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.
This
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, in turn, not
does
Verb problem
apply
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only
cause
Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
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people
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's behavior, but their productivity
also
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 suffers.
Since if
Correct word choice
If
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 they are angry, they cannot do
right
Correct article usage
the right
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works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
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 or they do less work than usual. So, well and enough sleep is important. To tackle the issue of
lack
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 of sleep, there are some measurable solutions. First and foremost, individuals who have that problem should organize
schedule
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a schedule
the schedule
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 for sleeping. Some
people
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 must go to bed and get up at the same
time
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 every day
along with
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 7-8 hours of sleep.
Furthermore
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, they have to eliminate the
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amount
Change the quantifier
number
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 of naps
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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they take during the daytime
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 since they have a profound impact
to go
Change preposition
on going
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 to bed on
time
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. If someone takes a number of naps during the day, they might feed with sleep and go to bed late.
Also
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, if they exercise, it cannot be harmful to
hours
Correct article usage
the hours
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 they sleep, because there is a fact that exercises help well-organized sleep hours. In conclusion,
while
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this
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 essay provided some
problems
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 including mental health issues and bad
behavior
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behaviour
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 which are generated by sleep deprivation, it
also
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 gives some methods for eliminating
a
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apply
show examples
less
amount
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 of sleep
time
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.

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Insomnia
  • Sleep deprivation
  • Sleep disorders
  • Sleep quality
  • Fatigue
  • Exhaustion
  • Restless
  • Restorative sleep
  • REM sleep
  • Circadian rhythm
  • Sleep hygiene
  • Napping
  • Sleep duration
  • Melatonin
  • Sleep-inducing
  • Drowsiness
  • Sleep disturbances
  • Obstructive sleep apnea
  • Snoring
  • Sleepwalking
  • Sleep talking
  • Shift work
  • Sleeping pills
  • Sleep aid
  • Relaxation techniques
  • Meditation
  • Deep breathing
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