Some people think painting and drawings are important as other subjects. They should be compulsory in high school education. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #drawings #subjects #school #education

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Some people believe that

paintings

and drawings should be made

compulsore

Correct your spelling

compulsory

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

high school

education

as these subjects are equally vital as other subjects

such

mathemetics

Correct your spelling

mathematics

and science. It is true that these subjects have some crucial significance for ensuring the

overall

Correct your spelling

development

developement

Correct your spelling

development

of the

children

Paintings

and

drawing

Fix the agreement mistake

drawings

show examples

are the ways of

self expression

Add a hyphen

self-expression

show examples

for

children

which enable them to express their thoughts and emotions in an innovative way.

Such

artistic

Correct article usage

an artistic

show examples

form of expression is essential for ensuring the cognitive growth of the

children

since it

allow

Change the verb form

allows

show examples

them to think beyond their realities and delve into imagination and philosophical state.

Additonally

Correct your spelling

Additionally

, it

also

increases the critical thinking ability of the

children

, influencing them to consider

situation

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situations

show examples

from a diverse range of perspectives. Exploring different perspectives,

children

become capable

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show examples

handly

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handle

show examples

criticial siutaion

Correct your spelling

critical situations

with patience and

learn

Wrong verb form

learning

show examples

to respect opposing views and opinions which is a crucial skill for humankind.

Furthermore

art

education

can foster cultural appreciation and understanding, eroding the boundaries of nations since

art

is considered

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apply

show examples

a universal form of communication. Consider the starry night painting of Van Gogh, which

receive

Wrong verb form

received

show examples

appreciation worldwide and has been commonly used in

fashion

Add an article

the fashion

show examples

world of all

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

countries. Apart from the cultural value,

art

education

can

also

be an advantage in building up a rewarding career in media and communication fields where artistic skill is valued for

desiging

Correct your spelling

designing

websites and marketing strategies.

Additonally

Correct your spelling

Additionally

paintings

can provide therapeutic

benifits

Correct your spelling

benefits

and promote mental

well being

Add a hyphen

well-being

show examples

by giving the artists a sense of joy and happiness as they complete a new piece of

art

To sum up

art

and

paintings

Fix the agreement mistake

painting

show examples

should be made compulsory

Change preposition

show examples

the secondary level of

education

for all

children

Submitted by tanjum.tushi on Fri Dec 20 2024

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coherence cohesion

To improve logical structure, try to organize your ideas into more distinct paragraphs, each with a clear central idea.

coherence cohesion

Consider providing more transitions between sentences to improve flow.

task achievement

Elaborate more on certain points to enhance clarity and comprehension, such as how art specifically influences cognitive development.

coherence cohesion

The essay includes a strong introduction and a clear conclusion, effectively framing the discussion.

task achievement

Relevant examples are provided, such as the mention of Van Gogh, which helps illustrate points.

task achievement

A reasonable response is provided, addressing the prompt and discussing both cultural and educational significance of art.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
25
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

282 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

artistic expression
communication
self-expression
creativity
critical thinking skills
cultural appreciation
understanding
therapeutic benefits
mental well-being
career opportunities

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Some people think painting and drawings are important as other subjects. They should be compulsory in high school education. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In some countries, companies allow people to work from home. In others, people are still expected to work in an office. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people claim that it is acceptable to use animals in medical research for the benefit of human beings, while others argue that it is wrong. Discuss both views and give your opinion.