IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The first chart below shows how energy is used in an average Australian household. The second chart shows the greenhouse gas emissions which result from this energy use. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The first chart below shows how energy is used in an average Australian household. The second chart shows the greenhouse gas emissions which result from this energy use. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The pie charts compare the proportion of
energy
Use synonyms
 usage and the corresponding
greenhouse
Use synonyms
gas
Use synonyms
emissions
Use synonyms
 across six categories in Australian households: heating, water heating, refrigeration, cooling, lighting, and other appliances. It is evident that
while
Linking Words
 heating consumes the largest share of household
energy
Use synonyms
, water heating contributes the most to
greenhouse
Use synonyms
gas
Use synonyms
emissions
Use synonyms
.
In contrast
Linking Words
, cooling and lighting account for the smallest proportions in both
energy
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 consumption and
emissions
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. Heating is the most significant
energy
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 consumer, making up 42% of household
energy
Use synonyms
 use.
However
Linking Words
, it contributes only 15% of
greenhouse
Use synonyms
gas
Use synonyms
emissions
Use synonyms
. Water heating, which accounts for 30% of
energy
Use synonyms
 usage, has a similar share of
greenhouse
Use synonyms
gas
Use synonyms
emissions
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, at 32%. Refrigeration and other appliances use 7% and 15% of household
energy
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, respectively, but their
greenhouse
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gas
Use synonyms
emissions
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 are significantly higher, at 14% and 28%.
This
Linking Words
 indicates that these categories are less
energy
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-efficient in terms of
emissions
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.
Finally
Linking Words
, cooling and lighting are the least
energy
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-consuming activities, at 2% and 4%, respectively. They
also
Linking Words
 produce the lowest
emissions
Use synonyms
, with cooling at 3% and lighting at 8%.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words energy, greenhouse, gas, emissions with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "significant" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Average Australian household
  • Greenhouse gas emissions
  • Energy consumption
  • Activities
  • Heating
  • Cooling
  • Water heating
  • Appliances
  • Lighting
  • Standby
  • Percentage (%)
  • Consumption patterns
  • Efficiency
  • Emissions impact
  • Renewable energy
  • Energy-saving measures
  • Sustainability
  • Carbon footprint
  • Electricity
  • Natural gas
  • Emissions breakdown
  • Energy audit
  • Environmental impact
  • Conservation
  • Mitigation strategies
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