Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Others think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. SA

#people #attention #sa

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Some

people

Use synonyms

think that these commercials play a significant role

Change preposition

show examples

shopping others do not want to get it seriously they only choose whatever they want.

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss

benefits

Correct article usage

the benefits

show examples

of advertising

people

Use synonyms

can determine with

information

Use synonyms

in the advertising and

drawbacks

Correct article usage

the drawbacks

show examples

of advertising a lot of fake

information

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. On the one side, television commercials are important for consumers because

this

Linking Words

is the only way to get the whole

information

Use synonyms

about any new commodity. Whenever a company

launched

Wrong verb form

launches

show examples

any new outcome they

they

Correct pronoun usage

show examples

Linking Words

firstly

Change the word

first

show examples

use

Correct subject-verb agreement

uses

show examples

advertisements to get it popularised in the public. In

this

Linking Words

way

Add a comma

way,

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the customer gets the

information

Use synonyms

related to

brand

Correct article usage

the brand

show examples

and they go to buy it.

Besides

Linking Words

, companies can

also

Linking Words

improve their sales volume by increasing the target market through bulletins.

For example

Linking Words

, a cosmetic company launched new lipstick and they can increase their demand of production by giving

information

Use synonyms

to women. On the flip side, some

people

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believe that

people

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should not pay

their

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

attention towards

broadcast

Fix the agreement mistake

broadcasts

show examples

because some of the promotions are fake nowadays. Some companies not only give misrepresentation about produce but

also

Linking Words

they are making fake

adds

Correct your spelling

ads

show examples

only to promote their products.

For example

Linking Words

The

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

products like

fair

Capitalize word

Fair

show examples

and

lovely

Capitalize word

Lovely

show examples

claims

Correct subject-verb agreement

claim

show examples

that

Correct pronoun usage

they

show examples

can fair the skin colour in 10 days, but

Remove the article

apply

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research proved that the argument is totally wrong as

this

Linking Words

product is made with hazardous chemicals that are not beneficial for the skin.

Moreover

Linking Words

, if there is no competition

then

Linking Words

these commercials play an important role

to create

Change preposition

in creating

show examples

a monopolistic market in the economy, which

impose

Correct subject-verb agreement

imposes

show examples

the detrimental effect of inequality in their society. In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

the plenty of presence has made the advertisement less attractive way to reach the target market, I believe if they are designed creatively and broadcast in the right place, these could be the most significant device to seduce anyone to consume a good.

Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on Tue Dec 24 2024

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Task Achievement

Expand on both perspectives in more detail and make sure your opinion is clearly stated and supported with examples. This will enhance the overall task response.

Coherence and Cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea, and consider using more varied transitional phrases to clearly indicate relationships between ideas.

Task Achievement

The essay clearly discusses both views on advertising and gives a personal opinion in the conclusion, addressing the task appropriately.

Coherence and Cohesion

There is a clear attempt to structure the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

312 words

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Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Others think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. SA

Your opinion

Some parents prefer to have their children receive home tuition, an alternative that traditional education teachers have always questioned. What are reasons to support home tuition?

More and more people today are buying and driving cars which has a positive impact for the economy but can hurt the environment. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages

There is a good deal of evidence that increasing car use is contributing to global warming and having other undesirable effects on people’s health and well-being. What can be done to discourage people from using their cars

It is often considered that change is more beneficial to people than trying to avoid it and have everything remain the same. Do you think the advantages of change outweigh the disadvantages?