IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. Do you agree or disagree?

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It is argued by some that workers need a longer weekend and
also
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 the work
time
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 should decrease during the week. I
compeletly
Correct your spelling
completely
 agree with
this
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 opinion and in
this
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 essay, I will state the reasons in my view. The first and foremost reason for holding to my view is that increasing the rest
time
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 helps people to be
more
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apply
show examples
happier and healthier.
This
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 causes workers
have
Fix the infinitive
to have
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 a lot of
time
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 to hang out with their own family in order to empty their own negative energy
through
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along
show examples
 the way and
also
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 they could increase
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 mental health in order to achieve
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
sronger
Correct your spelling
stronger
 power in solving problems. Another reason for my position is that their family
necessery
Correct your spelling
necessary
necessarily
 have essential requirements which they
shoul
Correct your spelling
should
 help them in that situation.
For instance
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, their
childeren
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children
 need to learn how to face their problems.
According to
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this
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issue
Add a comma
issue,
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 their parents should have enough
time
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 to teach and train them like solutions, rules and regulations.
Lastly
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, it is
also
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 interesting to note that the individuals have to spend some
time
Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
on
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 personal plans
as well as
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 activities.
For example
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, they might need to check their cars and
also
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 fix some problems regarding their house.
Therefore
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, it is crucial that personal activities
consider
Wrong verb form
are considered
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 in
planing
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planning
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 work hours. In conclusion, I totally agree with
this
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 opinion that managers should consider
a
Correct article usage
apply
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more
time
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 to rest for workers in their companies. Given
this
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 situation, it
is recommend
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is recommended
show examples
 that governments have to write a policy of no tolerance related to
this
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 problem for people who work for a long
time
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 during the week.
In addition
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, they support these individuals against
their
Change the word
the
show examples
 issues which face.

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Task Response
To further improve task achievement, provide more specific examples and evidence to strengthen your arguments.
Coherence and Cohesion
To enhance coherence and cohesion, ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. Consider using linking words and phrases more effectively.
Task Response
The essay presents a clear position on the topic and supports it with reasons.
Coherence and Cohesion
Both the introduction and conclusion are well-structured, outlining the essay's stance clearly.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • productivity
  • burnout
  • motivation
  • mental well-being
  • work-life balance
  • job satisfaction
  • pollution levels
  • traffic congestion
  • consumer spending
  • economic implications
  • leisure and service sectors
What to do next:
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