All parents want the best opportunity for their children. There are some people who think schools should teach children skills but others think having a huge range of subjects is better for a child's future. Discuss both sides and give your opinion?

#parents #opportunity #children #people #schools #skills #range #subjects #child #future

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Balancing between personal growth and skill is pivotal for youngster growth,

Linking Words

whereas

Correct word choice

and

show examples

this

Linking Words

issue

became

Wrong verb form

has become

show examples

a contentious issue debate. where many people argue that schools

shoul

Correct your spelling

should

teach students

strengs

Correct your spelling

strength

However

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, cons to others

leraning

Correct your spelling

learning

a lot of

subjects

Use synonyms

could be better for

children

Use synonyms

future

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

essay will examine some key points of both 2 different views and

outlines

Correct subject-verb agreement

outline

show examples

my view.

To begin

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with, all parent want the

clearly

Change the adverb

clear

show examples

steps to be taken for their

children

Use synonyms

thus

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it will drive them to have a bright

future

Use synonyms

. Indeed, to

complish

Correct your spelling

complete

this

Linking Words

goal school has a significant role,

in other words

Linking Words

, schools

required

Add a missing verb

are required

show examples

to design a

currilum

Correct your spelling

curriculum

that

tailor

Wrong verb form

is tailored

show examples

to every student's

future

Use synonyms

. Some people believe that expertise should be

though

Correct your spelling

taught

show examples

children

Use synonyms

asit

Correct your spelling

as it

can be

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

fundamental to their

proffesion

Correct your spelling

profession

later.

For example

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, a

child

Use synonyms

who

enjoy

Change the verb form

enjoys

show examples

swimming should

be having

Wrong verb form

have

show examples

more time to enhance his/her talent to be an expert in swimming in

future

Use synonyms

On the other hand

Linking Words

, many people argue that

children

Use synonyms

their

Change the word

show examples

young age should teach all

subjects

Use synonyms

according to

Linking Words

Correct article usage

the standarization

show examples

standarization

Correct your spelling

standardization

standardisation

curriculum

Add an article

the curriculum

show examples

has

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

subjects

Use synonyms

are

Correct article usage

a minumum

show examples

minumum

Correct your spelling

minimum

of knowledge that students have to

known

Change the verb

know

show examples

Additonally

Correct your spelling

Additionally

, if students want to be experts

in particular

Linking Words

subjects

Use synonyms

, they probably can expand their skills and interests in the

higer

Correct your spelling

higher

institute.

For instance

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, a

child

Use synonyms

who has

interest

Add an article

an interest

show examples

in matchematics or someone who

want

Change the verb form

wants

show examples

to be a scientist,

this

Linking Words

child

Use synonyms

can

persue

Correct your spelling

pursue

higer

Correct your spelling

higher

education

such

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as a

bachelor

Change noun form

bachelor's

show examples

degree or even a

master

Change noun form

master's

show examples

degree.

Linking Words

However

Add a comma

However,

show examples

this

Linking Words

child

Use synonyms

should

be finished

Wrong verb form

finish

show examples

all

subject

Fix the agreement mistake

subjects

show examples

with a

minumum

Correct your spelling

minimum

standard as required.

To sum up

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, even though

children

Use synonyms

should be prepared from their young age to be

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

succesful

Correct your spelling

successful

but

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

from my perspective

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

stakeholders have designed

a minimum standards

Correct the article-noun agreement

a minimum standard

minimum standards

show examples

of knowledge to prepare

Correct pronoun usage

them to

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

good

citizen

Fix the agreement mistake

citizens

show examples

both

Change preposition

for both

show examples

skill and personal growth.

Thus

Linking Words

children

Use synonyms

should finish all

subject

Fix the agreement mistake

subjects

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

schools

Fix the agreement mistake

school

show examples

Submitted by masry.pakpahan on Thu Dec 26 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Ensure that your introduction clearly outlines both views and your own stance. It should serve as a roadmap for the reader.

task achievement

Try to develop each point more fully with supporting details. This will help to thoroughly address both views and demonstrate a complex understanding.

coherence cohesion

Work on improving transitions between sentences and paragraphs to enhance the logical flow of your essay.

coherence cohesion

Revise and proofread your essay to correct errors in grammar, spelling, and punctuation.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion that contextualize the debate and provide a point of view.

task achievement

Both sides of the argument are addressed, and an opinion is stated, aligning with the requirements of the task.

13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
49
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

315 words

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All parents want the best opportunity for their children. There are some people who think schools should teach children skills but others think having a huge range of subjects is better for a child's future. Discuss both sides and give your opinion?

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

It is a natural process that animal species such as dinosaurs become extinct. There is no reason for people to prevent this from happening. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease government should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree.