IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The three pie charts give the details of transition of expenditure collected by local government in Someland each year in terms of 6 important categories over the period in question.

The three pie charts give the details of transition of expenditure collected by local government in Someland each year in terms of 6 important categories over the period in question.
#three #transition #expenditure #government #someland #year #terms #categories #period
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The three pie
chart
Fix the agreement mistake
charts
show examples
illustrates
Correct subject-verb agreement
illustrate
show examples
 the details of
change
Add an article
the change
show examples
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 expenditure gathered by
local
Correct article usage
the local
show examples
 government in Someland each three
Use synonyms
year
Change to a plural noun
years
show examples
 in terms of 6
esssential
Correct your spelling
essential
 categories over the period.As a general overview,the predominant
proprotion
Correct your spelling
proportion
 was Higher
Education
Use synonyms
 in each
year
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
Other
Correct article usage
the Other
show examples
 category was the least. It is clearly been seen that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 Higher
Education
Use synonyms
 was 35% in 1980 but it had expanded in 1990
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 45% and went down in 2000 by 5%.The second highest among all except
2000's
Fix apostrophe usage
2000s
show examples
 was K-12
Education
Use synonyms
although
Linking Words
 it
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
started with 25% and finished
with
Change preposition
at
show examples
 18%
while
Linking Words
 transportation surpassed
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
last
Linking Words
Use synonyms
year
Change noun form
year's
show examples
 number with 22%. The least proportion was Other and each sequence
year
Use synonyms
 it decreased
6
Change preposition
by 6
show examples
%,4% and 1%
endew
Correct your spelling
endow
 with almost disappear. Environmental services
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 second least among the years
however
Linking Words
, each
year
Use synonyms
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 decreased and doubled
end
Change preposition
at end
show examples
 of the 2000.
Lastly
Linking Words
, Health and human resources showed fluctuations over
years
Correct article usage
the years
show examples
 it was 14%
beggining
Correct your spelling
beginning
 and
then
Linking Words
 rose 20% significantly and
become
Wrong verb form
became
show examples
equall
Correct your spelling
equal
equally
 with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
K-12
Education
Use synonyms
although
Linking Words
although
Linking Words
 in 2000 it
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
went down by a half percent.
Submitted by zeynepsuakinal on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "although, while".
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words year, education with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "went down" was used 2 times.
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