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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The chart below shows the expenditure of two countries on consumer goods in 2010. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons wher relevant

The chart below shows the expenditure of two countries on consumer goods in 2010. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons wher relevant
#expenditure #two #countries #consumer #goods #information #features #comparisons
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The given chart describes the outgoing cost
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
 customer
merchandises
Fix the agreement mistake
merchandise
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 of two countries which are A
land
Use synonyms
 and
B
Use synonyms
land
Use synonyms
 in 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, spending on cars was the most favourable item for both A and
B
Use synonyms
land
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, the
B
Use synonyms
land
Use synonyms
 has money used on care at 450
thousand
Use synonyms
pounds
Use synonyms
 which was higher than that of the A
land
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, at 400
thousand
Use synonyms
pounds
Use synonyms
. In
term
Fix the agreement mistake
terms
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 of
computer
Fix the agreement mistake
computers
show examples
, in the A
Use synonyms
land
Add a comma
land,
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 more than 350
thousand
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pounds
Use synonyms
 was used in comparison with less than that of the
Use synonyms
B
Correct your spelling
Bland
show examples
land
Use synonyms
. The money spent
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 printed
medias
Correct your spelling
media
show examples
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
A
land
Use synonyms
 was 300
thousand
Use synonyms
pounds
Use synonyms
,
wheras
Correct your spelling
whereas
 that of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
B
Use synonyms
land
Use synonyms
 at 100
thousand
Use synonyms
pounds
Use synonyms
significantly
Add a missing verb
was significantly
show examples
 higher. As for
fragance
Correct your spelling
fragrance
, the A and
B
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land
Use synonyms
 expensed respectively 200 and about 150
thousand
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pounds
Use synonyms
. The amount of spending on cameras was about 150
thousand
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pounds
Use synonyms
 in the A
land
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,
while
Linking Words
 the amount of the
B
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land
Use synonyms
 was crediblely higher at 350
thousand
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pounds
Use synonyms
. The
different
Replace the word
difference
show examples
 in money used on user goods in the
B
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land
Use synonyms
 had
higher
Correct article usage
a higher
show examples
 rank
to
Change preposition
than
show examples
 the A
land
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by midden-02.tore on

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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words land, b, thousand, pounds with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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