IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Write a paragraph (about 140 - 160 words) about teens’ stress and solutions. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#paragraph #teens’ #stress
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Stress
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 is a common experience for teenagers, particularly during the rebellious phase, driven by rapid physical, mental, and environmental changes. As a teenager, there are various factors that contribute to my
stress
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. Teenagers experience
stress
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 from academic pressures, family expectations, social dynamics, and concerns about relationships and sexuality. Other common stressors include
time
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 constraints, feeling overwhelmed, and lack of sleep. As a teenager, it is crucial to plan and prioritize strategies to get me out of
this
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 troublesome issue.
First,
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to manage
stress
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, I prioritize creating a well-structured weekly timetable,
balancing
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and balancing
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 study
time
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 and activities.
This
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 ensures effective
time
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 management and adequate sleep, which is crucial for both physical and emotional well-being.
As a result
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, I maintain restorative sleep, essential for
stress
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 management.
Second,
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I regularly engage in physical exercise, a proven
stress
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 reliever that helps alleviate
stress
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 and fatigue.
Additionally
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, I prioritize leisure activities,
such
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 as spending
time
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 with loved ones or enjoying hobbies like cooking, music, and films, all of which contribute to
stress
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 reduction.
Finally
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, I openly discuss my problems with trusted individuals, gaining perspective and developing solutions rather than keeping them to myself. In short, to effectively manage these situations, it is vital to have a reasonable schedule and a healthy lifestyle so
stress
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 can go away easier.
Submitted by lyhuongclc on

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coherence cohesion
Enhance logical structure by ensuring each paragraph smoothly transitions into the next, perhaps by adding linking words or phrases. This will make the essay flow better and help maintain the focus on stress management in each paragraph.
task achievement
Try to elaborate a bit more on the specific examples or personal experiences related to stress. Providing more detailed examples can enhance task achievement by showcasing the application of solutions to real-life scenarios.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-presented, clearly outlining the issue of stress and offering solutions.
task achievement
The essay does a good job of addressing various aspects of teenage stress, such as academics, family, and social issues, giving a well-rounded overview of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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