All criminals should have access to education and rehabilitation programs while in prison. To what extent do you agree or disagree on this IELTS topic?

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This
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is a pressing issue that all
lawbreaker
Fix the agreement mistake
lawbreakers
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have access to learning and reform
programs
Use synonyms
while
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they are in prison. I completely agree with the given statement as education will educate them to be good human beings and recovery
programs
Use synonyms
will help them to avoid bad habits. In the upcoming paragraphs, both
the
Correct article usage
apply
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points will be discussed with relevant examples. To commence with, literacy is a fundamental key which
provide
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provides
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knowledge to gain good habits and become a great personality.
Furthermore
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, education will give information about good and bad things to the offenders during their jail period which will boost their thinking towards a positive attitude.
This
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will reduce the chances of
further
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crime.
For example
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, a recent study found that teachers have the ability to
mold
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mould
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any mind towards
the
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apply
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healthy thinking and
this
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will help
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the culprit
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culprit
Fix the agreement mistake
culprits
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to think with
positive
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a positive
show examples
attitude.
Thus
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, with the help of
learning
Correct article usage
the learning
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system in prison,
offender
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the offender
an offender
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has a chance to see
the
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apply
show examples
life in
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a more
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more
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apply
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healthier way, and
this
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can clear their vision for remaining part of living
that
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apply
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how they should spend their time.
Furthermore
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, they have many negative happenings in their brain which will provoke them to do the crime. But, recovery
programs
Use synonyms
will help them in many ways.
Firstly
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, professional
counsellings
Replace the word
counsellors
show examples
will support them to express themselves
such
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as what they are feeling,
their
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and their
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situation of mind, and
counsellor
Add an article
a counsellor
the counsellor
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will figure out everything with
him
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them
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in a better way.
For instance
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, a recent research concluded that 60 %
crimes
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of crimes
show examples
can be minimised with the help of regular treatment
programs
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of
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for
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felon
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felons
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.
Additionally
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, these sessions help them to stay motivated,
be
Correct word choice
and be
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kind and empathetic because
counsellor
Correct article usage
the counsellor
show examples
will repeat those factors to them on
daily
Correct article usage
a daily
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basis.
To conclude
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, I believe, with the help of
education
Correct article usage
the education
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system and
continuos
Correct your spelling
continuous
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corrective
programs
Use synonyms
, crime can be minimised. So, I completely agree with the given notion that in prison
these kind
Change the determiner
this kind
these kinds
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of activities should be
happened
Verb problem
done
show examples
as
this
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will generate good personalities and help
culprit
Fix the agreement mistake
culprits
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to ignore negative thoughts.
This
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is beneficial for all human beings.
Submitted by priyankapanwar251287 on

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language
Make sure to proofread your essay to catch any subject-verb agreement issues, such as 'lawbreaker have' should be 'lawbreakers have'.
language
Ensure more varied sentence structures to enhance the overall readability of your essay.
task
Provide more specific examples and data to strengthen your arguments, focusing on studies or programs with proven success.
task
Develop each point more thoroughly, integrating evidence more directly into your argument to enhance task response and coherence.
structure
Your introduction clearly states your position and outlines the main points to be discussed, which provides a clear roadmap for the reader.
structure
You effectively use transitions such as 'furthermore' and 'to commence with' to maintain a logical flow between and within paragraphs.
content
The conclusion neatly ties back to the main points discussed and reiterates your agreement with the statement, achieving a satisfying resolution.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Recidivism
  • Reintegration
  • Personal development
  • Re-offending
  • Transformation
  • Root causes
  • Criminal behavior
  • Rehabilitation
  • Skilled workforce
  • Ethical dilemma
  • Funding prioritization
  • Incarceration
  • Societal benefits
  • Addressing causes
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