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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below gives information about the number of social networking sites people used in Canada in 2014 and 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. IELTS

The chart below gives information about the number of social networking sites people used in Canada in 2014 and 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. IELTS
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The bar chart given illustrates the proportion of
people
Use synonyms
 that used different
amount
Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
show examples
 of social
netwroking
Correct your spelling
networking
sites
Use synonyms
 in Canada which are:No
sites
Use synonyms
,
One
Use synonyms
site
Use synonyms
,
Two
Use synonyms
sites
Use synonyms
,Three
sites
Use synonyms
,Four
sites
Use synonyms
,and Five
sites
Use synonyms
 in
two
Use synonyms
 years, 2014 and 2015.
Overall
Linking Words
, there is a downward trend in the bar chart given, and the
people
Use synonyms
 in Canada used no
sites
Use synonyms
 or
one
Use synonyms
site
Use synonyms
 mostly in 2014,where 22% of
people
Use synonyms
 didn't
use
Use synonyms
 any
sites
Use synonyms
,and 36% used only
one
Use synonyms
site
Use synonyms
, compared to 2015 where 21% of
people
Use synonyms
 didn't
use
Use synonyms
 any
sites
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
 28% of
people
Use synonyms
 used
one
Use synonyms
site
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, more
people
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
use
Wrong verb form
used
show examples
two
Use synonyms
sites
Use synonyms
 in 2015 compared to 2014. Where 24% used
two
Use synonyms
sites
Use synonyms
 of social
network
Fix the agreement mistake
networks
show examples
,
in contrast
Linking Words
 to 23% of
people
Use synonyms
used
Correct pronoun usage
who used
show examples
two
Use synonyms
sites
Use synonyms
 in 2014. The downward trend starts when
people
Use synonyms
used
Wrong verb form
use
show examples
 three
sites
Use synonyms
 or more.We can conclude that
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
people
Use synonyms
use
Use synonyms
 more than
two
Use synonyms
sites
Use synonyms
 as only 12%
Use synonyms
use
Wrong verb form
used
show examples
 three
sites
Use synonyms
 in 2014, and 16% in 2015, compared to the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of
people
Use synonyms
 who used
two
Use synonyms
sites
Use synonyms
 for both years.
Moreover
Linking Words
, 5% only
uses
Wrong verb form
used
show examples
 four
sites
Use synonyms
 in 2014
while
Linking Words
 8% in 2015.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the downward trend
continous
Correct your spelling
continues
 with 2% only
uses
Wrong verb form
using
show examples
 five
sites
Use synonyms
 in 2014
Linking Words
while
Correct word choice
and
show examples
 4% in 2015.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people, sites, one, site, two, use with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "downward" was used 3 times.
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