People doing dangerous sport activities like scuba diving and bungee jumping, they should be responsible for their own life and rescue workers should not risk their lives to save people. Do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays a lot of people are practising dangerous sports namely scuba diving ,
bungee
jumping .
In Correct word choice
and bungee
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
essay,
i
will talk about why individuals must be Change the capitalization
I
responible
for their Correct your spelling
responsible
life
and why the workers who rescue must not put their lives at risk when rescuing Fix the agreement mistake
lives
humens
.
Correct your spelling
humans
Firstly
, why everyone should take the Linking Words
responsiblity
Correct your spelling
responsibility
to keep
Change preposition
for keeping
him self
safe Correct your spelling
himself
at
playing dangerous activities ? The most reasonable thing Change preposition
from
Linking Words
that
is to prevent any deadly injury from Correct pronoun usage
apply
happining
Correct your spelling
happening
Linking Words
also
to stop other people from coping Correct word choice
and also
his
dangerous actions . Change preposition
with his
For instance
, many crowds watch unsafety sports Linking Words
at
Change preposition
on
tv
or any Correct your spelling
TV
another
media platform and Correct quantifier usage
other
sometime
Fix the agreement mistake
sometimes
the
become curious about what would Correct your spelling
they
happin
if they tried it Correct your spelling
happen
and
because they are not trained to do so , they will end up with Correct word choice
apply
a
serious damage and harm themselves .
Remove the article
apply
Secondly
, why rescue workers must not Linking Words
safe
any person and make his self at risk Replace the word
save
to get
Change preposition
of getting
a
harmful Correct article usage
apply
wonds
first of all , everyone is responsible Correct your spelling
wounds
words
to take
care Change preposition
for taking
in
his own body so no one Change preposition
of
desireve
to harm Correct your spelling
desires
desire
his self
for helping another human . Correct your spelling
himself
Therefor
, to ensure that he Correct your spelling
Therefore
don't
injure his body and Correct subject-verb agreement
doesn't
geting
Correct your spelling
gets
a
Correct article usage
apply
posible
disabilities in the future . Correct your spelling
possible
For
Linking Words
example
if someone helped a person from drowning he could get drowned Add a comma
example,
also
and probably die .
In conclusion , in my Linking Words
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
i
agree with Change the capitalization
I
this
statement because you should be trained enough to practice unsafe sports and you Linking Words
the
only person who should take care of your actions no one else .Add a missing verb
are the
Submitted by hooralahmadx4 on
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structure
Make sure to clearly outline your main points in the introduction and provide a more detailed conclusion summarizing the key arguments.
cohesion
Improve paragraph transitions for better flow of ideas across the essay. Use linking phrases to guide the reader through your arguments.
example use
Ensure your examples are specific and well explained to clearly illustrate your points.
task response
Try to expand on your ideas and explanations, to fully cover the relevant aspects of the question.
task response
The essay presents a clear stance on the issue, which aligns well with the task requirements.
supporting ideas
The writer attempts to provide reasons and examples to support their points, showing an understanding of the task.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.