In some countries, online shopping is replacing shopping in stores. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

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There is no denying that online shopping is becoming more popular these days.
While
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it is a commonly held belief that electronic shopping negatively affects certain things, there is
also
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an argument that remote shopping has saved us time.
This
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essay will analyze
this
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topic from both points of view and express my opinion. On one hand, buying from suspicious websites has many downsides.
In other words
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, you might face scams or theft
as a result
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of using them.
In addition
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, even with a reliable website, you may come up against issues,
such
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as not getting the right size or good quality.
On the other hand
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, for sure there are a lot of benefits we can’t ignore. It is
also
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possible to say that, you easily can order from any country without the need to travel,
Moreover
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, saving time
instead
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of going to the mall to buy stuff, with ease you can order from your phone and couch. In conclusion, there are no easy answers to
this
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question. On balance,
however
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. I tend to believe, depending on your personality that you are a careful person or unconcerned. Usually, accurate people prefer to see things in real and try them,
whereas
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some people are careless and don’t have special conditions,
thus
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, they accept anything.
Submitted by reemabdullah395 on

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task achievement
The points in your essay are clear, but they could be better supported with specific examples or evidence to strengthen your arguments. Consider adding more concrete examples from personal experience or wider studies and statistics that could help in illustrating your points.
coherence cohesion
While your overall structure is clear and logical, with an introduction, main body paragraphs, and conclusion, you might want to consider refining your transitions for better coherence. Use linking words and phrases to connect ideas smoothly across paragraphs, helping the reader to follow your argument more comfortably.
task achievement
Your introduction sets up the discussion effectively and you successfully revisit your main arguments in the conclusion, providing a complete response to the task.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is structured with a clear introduction and conclusion, which facilitates the flow of the argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • unparalleled convenience
  • remote areas
  • wide range of products
  • broad selection
  • price comparison
  • customer satisfaction
  • value for money
  • impact on local businesses
  • economic diversity
  • job losses
  • environmental implications
  • packaging waste
  • carbon emissions
  • carbon footprint
  • data privacy
  • cybersecurity
  • personal data
  • tactile shopping experience
  • immediate gratification
  • physically examined
  • robust measures
  • consumer information
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