Whereas some think that celebrities should not get involved in politics, others claim they can play an important role in changing society. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
There is a debate between
Use synonyms
society
that Add an article
a society
the society
renowed
Correct your spelling
renowned
people
Use synonyms
has
to be Correct subject-verb agreement
have
part
of political Use synonyms
decisions
, Use synonyms
however
, others do not agree with Linking Words
this
opinion. Linking Words
However
, Linking Words
while
some Linking Words
people
believe that famous individuals have an important role Use synonyms
to alter
our world, I agree with those who think that they should not be Change preposition
in altering
the
Change the article
apply
part
of any Use synonyms
decisions
.
On the one hand, the world has already digitalized, and Use synonyms
the
social Correct article usage
apply
media
has already Use synonyms
became
Change the verb form
become
the
Correct article usage
a
part
of our lives. Almost every individual has a social Use synonyms
media
account as it is Use synonyms
indispensible
for us, Correct your spelling
indispensable
consequently
, famous influencers, singers, Linking Words
bloggers
are familiar with different ideas, and complaints since they are Correct word choice
and bloggers
only
ones who can share, and ask Correct article usage
the only
government
to make a proper decision in order to achieve justice. Add an article
the government
For example
, if there is a problem in Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
society
, members usually ask one of these individuals to share it, and get the attention of important authorities, and Use synonyms
as a result
, the problem might be solved as Linking Words
people
would be pushable. Use synonyms
Moreover
, some Linking Words
people
Use synonyms
thinks
that social Change the verb form
think
media
users have Use synonyms
an
huge impact on our behaviours and attitudes. If influencers would share anything impactful on Change the article
a
society
, Use synonyms
people
might tend to follow these rules.
On the Use synonyms
another
hand, I believe that there are more arguments to suggest that Correct quantifier usage
other
an
important Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
decisions
should be Use synonyms
came
into force by related authorities of the governments. Wrong verb form
come
People
in the government are familiar with the detrimental aspects of every new law, and they Use synonyms
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
favor
Change the spelling
favour
possible
healthy side of these suggestions. I would argue that the quality of education, health, business, or other sectors would be far lower if uneducated well-known Add an article
the possible
people
Use synonyms
involved
Add a missing verb
were involved
to
these improvements, and Change preposition
in
as a result
, Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
society
might be destroyed, Use synonyms
However
, in my Linking Words
opinion
the most damaging aspect of Add a comma
opinion,
these idea
is the impact of those Change the determiner
this idea
these ideas
people
on personal Use synonyms
decisions
. Use synonyms
People
Use synonyms
of
social Change preposition
on
media
Use synonyms
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
the
privelege
to directly impact Correct your spelling
privilege
on
societal mindset, and Change preposition
apply
if
young adolescents who want to be Correct word choice
apply
lawyer
, Fix the agreement mistake
lawyers
advocate
, or Correct subject-verb agreement
advocates
minister
, and want to be Fix the agreement mistake
ministers
part
of Use synonyms
the
Correct article usage
apply
succesfull
Correct your spelling
successful
decisions
would tend to be Use synonyms
a
famous on Change the article
apply
internet
rather than being a Add an article
the internet
succesfull
Correct your spelling
successful
academic
.
Fix the agreement mistake
academics
To sum up
, Linking Words
although
it is undeniable that Linking Words
renowed
Correct your spelling
renowned
people
have Use synonyms
an
vital influence on Change the article
a
society
, I believe that they should not be involved Use synonyms
to
Change preposition
in
the
politics.Correct article usage
apply
Submitted by nazrin.ceferova on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and that it connects strongly to your main argument.
coherence cohesion
Use linking words and phrases to guide the reader clearly from one point to another, ensuring smooth transitions.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repetitive phrasing and strive for a more varied expression to maintain reader engagement.
task achievement
Provide specific examples or evidence to support your main points more effectively.
task achievement
Be consistent in your argumentation; avoid contradicting yourself within the essay. Decide on a clear standpoint and stick with it throughout the essay.
task achievement
Be precise in your language and avoid using ambiguous phrases or complex sentences that might confuse the reader.
introduction
The introduction effectively presents both sides of the argument and offers a clear thesis statement of your own view.
conclusion
The essay contains a relevant conclusion that aligns with your main arguments.
clarity
You managed to maintain a clear opinion throughout the essay, which helps the reader understand your main point of view.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example