Nowadays in many countries people are following the latest fashion, hairstyle and so on. Why are they so influenced by fashion? Is it a positive or negative development?

#countries #people #fashion #hairstyle #development

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Nowadays, in several

nations

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nations,

show examples

fashion

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hair style

Correct your spelling

hairstyle

show examples

, and more

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are

show examples

becoming a vast trend among

teenegers

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teenagers

, for various of justifications. In my point of view, it has both merits and

demirets

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demerits

. In

this

Linking Words

essay

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essay,

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Change the capitalization

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will discuss

this

Linking Words

statement

further

Linking Words

below. On one side of the coin,

fashion

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can lead to dissatisfaction,

therefore

Linking Words

, clothing and

hair style

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hairstyle

show examples

have

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has

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become the foundation of a

person

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person's

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culture and personality,

for example

Linking Words

, if someone wears from brands and

latest

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the latest

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trends they will become increasingly valuable and popular than ordinary style,

moreover

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, people are brainwashed by brands marketing and reviews by celebrities who became role models for

fashion

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furthermore

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, people are with

blindeye

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blind eye

blind-eye

are following them disregard of

expences

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expenses

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, which is the main reason behind

bieng

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being

influenced by

fashion

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. On the other side of the coin, it can be beneficial

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apply

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and has an impact on

someone

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someone's

show examples

personality through encouraging them to take care of their selves.

Moreover

Linking Words

fashion

Use synonyms

can be the lead rope to

self satisfaction

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self-satisfaction

show examples

and delightful environment among them.

To sum up

Linking Words

latest

Correct article usage

the latest

show examples

fashion

Use synonyms

has both merits and

demiretsm

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demerits

it is delightful but not the only way to happiness,

therefore

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, there must be different factors to be influenced by.

Submitted by anfal.alnajdi on Mon Jan 06 2025

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task achievement

Work on building clear and comprehensive ideas within each paragraph. At times, the points being made were a bit disjointed or unclear. Try to ensure each paragraph presents a single clear idea or set of related ideas backed by explanations.

coherence cohesion

Improve the logical flow between points. While the essay generally followed a structure, transitions between points were sometimes abrupt. Consider using transitional phrases or linking sentences to smooth the flow between ideas and paragraphs.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, and the topic is addressed throughout, reflecting a good overall structure.

task achievement

You provided both sides of the argument, discussing both the positive and negative aspects of following fashion, which demonstrates a balanced approach.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

196 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Globalization
Social Media
Celebrities
Influencers
Peer Pressure
Social Acceptance
Disposable Income
Self-esteem
Confidence
Marketing Campaigns
Consumer Behavior
Fast Fashion
Sustainable Fashion
Self-expression
Cultural Identity

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Nowadays in many countries people are following the latest fashion, hairstyle and so on. Why are they so influenced by fashion? Is it a positive or negative development?

Fully explain your ideas

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

You have decided to leave your current job and look for a new one. Write a letter to a friend. In your letter explain why you want to leave your current job describe what kind of job you are looking for ask for some help or advice

In today's very competitive world, a worker has to possess multiple skills to succeed.among the skills do you think is more important, social skills or good qualification?

It is becoming more and more difficult to escape the influence of the media on our lives. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of living in a media-rich society.