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Writing Samples
Band 6

The use of nuclear power as a clean energy source. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

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Using nuclear power as a new source of clean
energy
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 is a noticeable ongoing trend in the world.
While
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 using nuclear
energy
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 may need a
lot
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 of
money
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, new alternative
energy
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 for the world and providing a
lot
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 of
energy
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 outweigh
this
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 minor setback. One significant advantage of using nuclear power is that that power can be exchanged with some old
energy
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 sources
such
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 as fossil fuel or coal.
This
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 is because nuclear
energy
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 protects air quality by producing massive amounts of carbon-free electricity which is
energy
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that is
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 generated without producing carbon emissions or other greenhouse gas.
For example
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, some countries have reduced the number of carbon dioxide in their countries which contributes a positive impact on greenhouse gas. Another significant advantage is the quantity of
energy
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 which nuclear
energy
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 provides. To be more specific, these energies will produce a
lot
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 of
energy
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 from chemical reactions, not only that it
also
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 needs a small amount of nuclear
therefore
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 it can manufacture a huge amount of
energy
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.
For instance
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, some countries
such
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 as Japan got used to nuclear
energy
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 in 1957.
This
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 makes nuclear
energy
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 take less
expenses
Fix the agreement mistake
expense
show examples
 for the government.
On the other hand
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, some argue that applying nuclear
energy
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 will take massive
money
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 in order to build a factory.
In other words
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, building an industry will cost a
lot
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 of
money
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 since it accounts for
awide
Correct your spelling
a wide
 space to build and is far away from the citizens in order to provide safety in case that industry gets destroyed.
This
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 is true,
however
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, when the factory was built, the architect had calculated the most possible solutions and prevented it,
thus
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 it is very safe.
For example
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, from the time that people started using nuclear
energy
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 to now, there were around 2 accidents which had happened. In conclusion,
while
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 nuclear
energy
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 may cost a
lot
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 of
money
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 to build a factory, it is
also
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 a new alternative
energy
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 source and supplies lots of
energy
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 for the citizens, those benefits far outweigh these drawbacks. Ultimately, the advantages of nuclear
energy
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 will be more popularized in the future

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task response
To improve task response, ensure that the essay fully addresses all parts of the prompt. The essay could benefit from a more in-depth analysis and discussion of the disadvantages of nuclear energy to better balance both sides of the argument.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, while the essay is generally well-structured, using clear transitions between sentences and paragraphs can enhance the logical flow. Consider linking ideas more explicitly.
coherence and cohesion
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the discussion around nuclear energy.
task response
The argument for the advantages of nuclear power is well-articulated, providing specific examples to support the points.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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