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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The graph below gives information about the percentage of population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. U

The graph below gives information about the percentage of population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. U
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The line graph compares the percentage of the population living in cities,for over 70 years increase how many individuals will live. It`s
obviously
Change the word
obvious
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 that
percentage
Correct article usage
the percentage
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 of
population
Add an article
the population
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 much
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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increased in each city during the period shown.
Overall
Linking Words
 most success
had
Verb problem
was
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 Malaysia and Indonesia
despite
Capitalize word
Despite
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 Malaysia in the first
plase
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place
 Indonesia relying on
statisics
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statistics
 rapidly grew
up
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apply
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thereby overtaking
in
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apply
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figure
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the
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 percentage of pollution in Thailand noticable slowed since 1990 and ended
of
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apply
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30 years ,exactly in 2020 after they gradually
keep
Wrong verb form
kept
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 population growth ,in the Philipines persentage of the pollution were normal 1990.
Hoewer
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However
, surprisingly they start
growth
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growing
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 in
wrong
Change the article
the wrong
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 direction
during
Change preposition
over
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 30 years ,
nevertheless
Linking Words
 that
didn
Correct your spelling
did
 t stop them from growing.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • graph
  • percentage
  • population
  • Asian countries
  • living in cities
  • 1970
  • 2020
  • predictions
  • 2030
  • 2040
  • introduction
  • overview
  • trend
  • body paragraph
  • compare
  • predicted percentages
  • summarize
  • closing statement
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