The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarise the information by selecting and. reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarise the information by selecting and. reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The diagram provided illustrates the process of
sugar
Use synonyms
production. It is clear from the diagram that the manufacturing process includes seven major stages, starting with
sugar
Use synonyms
cane cultivation and finishing with
sugar
Use synonyms
crystals being dried and cooled. The production begins with
sugar
Use synonyms
canes
Fix the agreement mistake
cane
show examples
being grown for 12 to 18 months. The mellow plants are
then
Linking Words
harvested with the use of special technology or manually. Collected plants are
then
Linking Words
crushed by special machinery in order to get juice, which contains several elements that have to be sorted out. The juice is purified with the help of
limestone
Correct article usage
a limestone
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filter, and the clear liquid is placed into the evaporator, in order to produce
sugar
Use synonyms
syrup. Two final steps include
sugar
Use synonyms
syrup being filtered once again through the centrifuge -
this
Linking Words
process allows to
separate
Replace the word
separation
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complete
Change preposition
of complete
show examples
sugar
Use synonyms
crystals from the liquid.
Finally
Linking Words
, the
sugar
Use synonyms
crystals are dried and cooled down.
This
Linking Words
way, the product is ready to be released
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
customers.
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words sugar with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "diagram" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • manufacturing process
  • sugar cane
  • harvesting
  • transporting
  • factory
  • crushing
  • extracting
  • juice
  • filtering
  • impurities
  • heating
  • evaporating
  • syrup
  • boiling
  • crystallizing
  • sugar
  • separating
  • drying
  • packaging
  • distribution
  • stage
  • process
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