Should schools focus more on academic subjects or extracurricular activities? Discuss your view.

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Imagine a
classrome
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classroom
where a student learns academic
knewledge
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knowledge
and life
skills
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. exploring how to deal with various
peopl
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people
and different
sutations
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situations
stations
. In
this
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ideal environment, children can solve any problems will be faced in
they
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their
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life.
While
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there is a common belief that schools should be more
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focus
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focused
show examples
on academic subjects. There is
also
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an opposing argument. In my perspective of view, I strongly agree with
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focus
Add an article
a focus
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
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both
are
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is
show examples
essencial
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essential
. On one hand. supporting extracurricular education is necessary for
enhance
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enhancing
show examples
thinking growth,
behaviors
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behaviours
show examples
and social
skills
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,what I mean to say . Studying all life
requierments
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requirements
from earlier age not only
expand
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expands
show examples
our knowledge and
awarness
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awareness
but
also
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give
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gives
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the
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us the
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ability to challenge all
circumstance
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circumstances
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.
Moreover
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, let
personal
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personnel
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know
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their desire
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desire
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desired
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specialty
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speciality
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in future
espcial
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especially
especial
when inviting
skills
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such
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as sport, art and music. For
exmple
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example
, In
country's
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country
show examples
like
Sudia
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Saudi
Arabia adding new
skills
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in
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to
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schools like football, arts and cooking
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this
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these
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are crafts
can
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that can
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show individuals advantage and
explor
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explore
in which sectors
have
Verb problem
they are
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skilled.
On the other hand
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, concentration on formal subjects can be more
benefit
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beneficial
show examples
for consuming time to
focus
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and more
traning
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training
.
In other words
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, materials like math, chemistry and physics need more
focus
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and study hard to fully understand
Furthermore
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, focusing on academics
prepars
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prepares
prepare
student for
standerdized
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standardized
standardised
test
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tests
show examples
and
universty
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university
admissions, which directly
influence
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influences
show examples
their future
prospective
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prospects
show examples
.
For instance
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, studying done by Cambridge
university
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University
show examples
about practice
the finding
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found
show examples
is the degree of
peopl
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people
had
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who had
show examples
more practice
higher
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was higher
show examples
than others. In conclusion, we could say that both are essential for personal growth and dividing our time between them should be our goal.

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task achievement
Ensure to provide a balanced discussion of both sides of the argument. You could further elaborate on why focusing more on academic subjects might be beneficial in certain contexts.
coherence cohesion
Try to maintain a clear structure throughout your essay. Use consistent linking words to guide the reader through your argument smoothly.
coherence cohesion
Revise for clarity and grammatical accuracy to improve readability.
task achievement
The essay provides a clear argument supporting a balanced focus on academic and extracurricular activities, which effectively addresses the question.
task achievement
The essay includes specific examples, such as the introduction of new skills in Saudi Arabian schools, which help illustrate the points made.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, which provide a good structure to your essay.
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