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Writing Samples
Band 5

The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. Do you agree or disagree?

#week #workers #weekend
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The duration of working days has gained significant attention in recent years.
This
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 essay will discuss why prolonging weekends is a great idea, as
this
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 helps employees
to
Verb problem
apply
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recharge and spend more time with family and themselves, and how
this
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 benefits the employees and employer. On the one hand, longer weekends help employees
to
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apply
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recharge by helping them catch up on sleep, which will later enable them to return to work feeling more energized, willing to take on their jobs responsibly, and focused.
For example
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, performance levels decrease near the end of the week, and some individuals tend to fall asleep during working hours
due to
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lack
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a lack
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 of energy.
On the other hand
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, we see many people giving their all time and effort to their jobs and later regretting it because of the damage
this
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 has done to their mental health,
instead
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 of focusing on themselves and their families, which could tremendously help their
overall
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 well-being.
For instance
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, mental health affects work performance and productivity in many ways, and a common reason for people to quit their jobs is not being able to bear the mental load
that is
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 pushed on them at work. In conclusion, the workweek should be shorter,
while
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 weekends need to be longer, to avoid overwhelming workers and affecting their social lives, which could
also
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 ruin productivity eventually.
Submitted by roycelparaiso on

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relevant specific examples
Consider providing more detailed examples and statistics to further support your points and make your argument more compelling.
complete response
Ensure the thesis statement is clear and directly expresses your position. A clear stance at the beginning will guide the arguments effectively.
introduction conclusion present
Your essay is organized well, with a clear introduction and conclusion, which aids in understanding.
logical structure
The arguments are logically structured, making it easier for the reader to follow your points.
supported main points
You have used relevant points to support your main ideas, contributing to a cohesive argument.
clear comprehensive ideas
Your ideas are clear and comprehensive throughout, which is important for conveying your position effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • productivity
  • burnout
  • motivation
  • mental well-being
  • work-life balance
  • job satisfaction
  • pollution levels
  • traffic congestion
  • consumer spending
  • economic implications
  • leisure and service sectors
What to do next:
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