international tourism is now more common than ever before. some feel that this is a positive trend, while others do not. what are your opinions on this?

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international
Capitalize word
International
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tourism
Use synonyms
is now more common than ever before. some feel that
this
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is a positive trend,
while
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others do not. what are your opinions on
this
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? Whether or not international
tourism
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benefits
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communities is a debatable issue as
this
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phenomenon is now commoner than in the past. Even though we will not be able to neglect the good sides, I believe that the drawbacks of international travel significantly outweigh its
benefits
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since both the environment and local inhabitants can suffer. on the one hand, some argue that
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tourism
Correct article usage
the tourism
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industry
had
Wrong verb form
has
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significantly contributed to
economics
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economic
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growth in countries, to put it differently, some say that travellers who visit a place spend
money
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while
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sightseeing the attractions.
And these
Correct word choice
These
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funds can have several
benefits
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.
firstly
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, hosts can use the
money
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to maintain a better-quality life.
secondly
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, the
money
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can be used to renovate the cities and historical sites.
However
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, I believe that
this
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money
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mainly comes with consequences.
for example
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,
on
Change preposition
in
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high seasons when a great deal of visitors take a vacation, there are always some reckless ones who destroy monuments and other places. Most of these historical sites had been built before the birth of the insulters. So, in my opinion, it is quite obvious why we should not prioritise economics over
preservation
Correct article usage
the preservation
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of these sites.
Moreover
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, there are people who believe that
tourism
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brings cultural
benefits
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. They say people can learn different lifestyles and languages from each other.
Nevertheless
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, we cannot turn a blind eye to the cultural conflicts that global
tourism
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can bring. Local inhabitants, especially
who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
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live in remote areas, are often not ready to experience a new lifestyle since they are stricter about their values. In Iran, some villagers still see hijab as a must.
last
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year a group of sightseers did not wear a hijab
while
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visiting a sacred tree on an island
nearby
Correct your spelling
near
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a village. A serious conflict happened between the tourists and locals, leading
in
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to
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injuries in both groups.
Thus
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, in many
situations
Add a comma
situations,
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a cultural exchange cannot happen easily and is not a
descent
Correct your spelling
decent
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idea.
To sum up
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, even though there may be some upsides to global
tourism
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like
money
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gaining and cultural exchange nowadays, in my opinion, the downsides are more as people and places can be hurt culturally and environmentally respectively. I hope in the future there will be fewer problems
due to
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the laws governments implement to ensure the safety of the environment and local cultures.
Submitted by ieltswriting345 on

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coherence-cohesion
The essay provides a clear introduction and conclusion, helping guide the reader through your opinions about international tourism.
task-achievement
You address both sides of the argument and present your opinion clearly, making the argument well-rounded.

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  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • sustainable tourism
  • cultural exchange
  • economic impact
  • hospitality sector
  • infrastructure development
  • environmental degradation
  • local economy
  • global understanding
  • seasonal fluctuations
  • tourist influx
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