To improve the job prospects,some people want the secondry schools to spend more time teaching communication and business skills and spend less time teaching history.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#job #prospects #people #secondry #schools #time #communication #business #skills #history

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It is often argued by some that to enhance

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

job

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performance, some individuals want the schools to invest more time teaching

conversation

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and

business

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skills

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and spend

meager

Correct word choice

less

show examples

time coaching history.

Although

Linking Words

some might disagree with the notion;

however

Linking Words

, I completely agree. Not only because of the leadership

ability

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Remove the comma

apply

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but

also

Linking Words

because of the value of

conversation

Use synonyms

skills

Use synonyms

modern

Add an article

the modern

show examples

job

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market.

This

Linking Words

essay will enunciate how these factors justify my opinion.

Firstly

Linking Words

value

Add an article

the value

show examples

business

Use synonyms

skills

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such

Linking Words

as marketing principles .

As through

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Through

show examples

good marketing

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skills

Add a comma

skills,

show examples

you can boost your

job

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prospects and can get

high

Add an article

a high

the high

show examples

level of success.

in contrast

Linking Words

, numerous companies watch your

business

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skills

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in the interview after that the chances of

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job

Correct article usage

a job

show examples

get higher if you have

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

good

business

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skills

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For example

Linking Words

bill gates

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Bill Gates

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was

also

Linking Words

the employer of a normal corporation but now he is

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the

show examples

biggest

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business man

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businessman

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because of

the

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his

show examples

marketing

skills

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Thus

Linking Words

skills

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are really essential in our

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

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and education places should teach these

skills

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in secondary years.

Secondly

Linking Words

, apart from the

business

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marketing

skills

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, aspects of

communication

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skills

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Change the verb form

are

show examples

also

Linking Words

important in every

job

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.Numerous managers look for those employees who have a strong

conversation

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ability

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For instance

Linking Words

, for a property dealer

job

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, owners watch the

communication

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ability

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, because in dealing

the

Change preposition

with the

show examples

customer

worker

Fix the agreement mistake

workers

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needs

Correct subject-verb agreement

need

show examples

a good understanding and

communication

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Hence

Linking Words

communication

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skills

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should be

coach

Wrong verb form

coached

show examples

in school so students don't feel difficulty in their

job

Use synonyms

life. In conclusion, the above evidence made it clear that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

business

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marketing

skills

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and

conversation

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ability

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should

coach

Wrong verb form

be coached

show examples

in schools and more time should be given to these subjects.

Submitted by nidarif855 on Mon Jan 13 2025

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task response

Ensure your arguments are well-balanced and consider counterarguments. Your response should not only argue in favor but also acknowledge potential drawbacks of reducing history education.

coherence and cohesion

Maintain a clear logical structure throughout the essay. Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and flows logically to the next.

task response

Provide specific examples and evidence to support your main points more consistently.

introduction and conclusion

Strong introduction and conclusion that provide a clear stance on the issue.

task response

Good use of examples, such as mention of Bill Gates, to support arguments.

coherence and cohesion

The essay has a well-defined introduction and conclusion, enhancing overall coherence.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
22
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

263 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

job prospects
communication skills
business skills
secondary schools
employers
oral and written communication
global economy
financial literacy
entrepreneurship
societal developments
employable skills
critical thinking
core curriculum
workforce preparation
modern employment
well-rounded students
professional success
academic achievement

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To improve the job prospects,some people want the secondry schools to spend more time teaching communication and business skills and spend less time teaching history.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays many people complain that they have difficulties getting enough sleep. What problems can lack of sleep course? What can be done about lack of sleep?

Some people think that the internet is shrinking the world with their benefits.Other argue that it has a adverse effect on civilizations due to poor famiy relationships Discuss both views

Many families move to different countries. Some people think children can benefit from this, while others consider it is hard for children if families move to a foreign country. Discuss both views and your opinion.

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

some people think that to be successful , you need to get in a university degree. where as others say it is not true. discuss both ideas and give your opinion ?