Many people believe that playing games and tv programs is beneficial but others say it doesnt improve the mental ability of children . What extend do you agree or disagree.

#people #games #tv #programs #doesnt #ability #children

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It is often argued by some that numerous individuals believe that playing

game

Fix the agreement mistake

games

show examples

and watching television programs is beneficial.

However

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, others say it does not enhance the mental capacity of infants.

Although

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some might agree with the notion;

however

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, I completely disagree. Not only because of stress relief

Remove the comma

apply

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but

also

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because of

creativity

Correct article usage

a creativity

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boost.

This

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essay will enunciate how these factors justify my opinion.

Firstly

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kids

Use synonyms

feel

stress free

Add a hyphen

stress-free

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after playing

games

Use synonyms

or watching television.

As because

Change preposition

Because

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of the hectic schedule of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

education,

childrens

Correct your spelling

children

children's

are mentally exhausted after coming back to their home.

For example

Linking Words

games

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

as making

a words

Correct the article-noun agreement

words

a word

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find

Wrong verb form

finding

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the difference between

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

pictures develop mental capacity and

also

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give a break from studies.

Thus

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, having

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

leisure time can refresh

infants

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infants'

infant's

show examples

mind

Correct subject-verb agreement

minds

show examples

and help them to be active

while

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doing homework

Secondly

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, apart from the stress relief, creativity

also

Linking Words

boosts from these activities.

As children

Correct word choice

Children

show examples

learn many skills through

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

games

Use synonyms

and programs

such

Linking Words

as solving

puzzle

Fix the agreement mistake

puzzles

show examples

or watching

paintings

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painting

show examples

series.

For instance

Linking Words

, there are numerous shows

Change preposition

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

television

such

Linking Words

creative

Correct your spelling

Creative Kids

show examples

kids

Use synonyms

, where

childrens

Correct your spelling

children

show examples

shows

Correct subject-verb agreement

show

show examples

and coach other

kids

Use synonyms

many creativities.

Hence

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kids

Use synonyms

can learn the skills through the

games

Use synonyms

or series. In conclusion, the above evidence made it clear that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

anxiety relief and

increase

Correct article usage

an increase

show examples

in skills through

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

gaming and programming

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

beneficial for offspring mental health.

Submitted by nidarif855 on Mon Jan 13 2025

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task achievement

Make sure to support each main point with relevant and detailed examples to strengthen your argument.

coherence cohesion

Enhance the clarity of your paragraphs by avoiding some grammatical inaccuracies and repetitions.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which frames the argument effectively.

task achievement

You have effectively presented your viewpoint with a logical structure, outlining your disagreement clearly.

task achievement

The rationale for your opinion, such as stress relief and creativity boost, is clearly articulated.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
26
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

222 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

cognitive development
problem-solving skills
spatial awareness
analytical thinking
multiplayer games
social abilities
imagination
creativity
interactive content
stress relief
relaxation
anxiety
screen time
physical activity
eye strain
sleep patterns
educational value

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Many people believe that playing games and tv programs is beneficial but others say it doesnt improve the mental ability of children . What extend do you agree or disagree.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Some people think that it is important to use leisure time for activities that develop the mind, such as reading and doing crossword puzzles. Others feel that it is important to give one's mind a rest in leisure time. Discuss

Should education and healthcare be free of charge and funded by the government, or should it be the responsibility of the people to pay for these services? Discuss the above and give your opinion using examples.

As global trade increase, many goods including those we use in daily basis are produced in another country and have to be transport long distance.

It was predicted that people living in the twenty-first century would have more free time than ever before because of improvements in technology. To what extent has this prediction come true?

Some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in.