IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Computer SS increasingly in education There will be no role for teachers in the classroom. Give a reason for your answer and include any relevant example from your knowledge

#computer #ss #education #role #teachers #classroom #reason
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in these times computers have become a big part of our lives, we use them for almost everything, work, study,
entertainment
Correct word choice
and entertainment
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. I personally think that computers are not a good idea, because teachers do more than just conduct lessons, they help to cope with difficulties First
off
Replace the word
of
show examples
 all,
students
Use synonyms
 who have problems with learning may not benefit as much from the
technology
Use synonyms
 itself.
In addition
Linking Words
, in recent years the problem of addiction to computers and phones has increased, which has
also
Linking Words
 increased the number of vision problems.
In addition
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, studies show that live lessons effectively increase
students
Use synonyms
' understanding than online lessons
Secondly
Linking Words
,
for example
Linking Words
 during the
pandemicovid
Correct your spelling
pandemic
 19 many
students
Use synonyms
 experienced a decline in the quality of education
due to
Linking Words
 online classes, I know
this
Linking Words
 because my relatives who are still
educating
Wrong verb form
educated
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 felt that online learning was harder for them.
additionally
Linking Words
,
At
Change the preposition
In
show examples
 the beginning,
technology
Use synonyms
 offers advantages to education.
For example
Linking Words
, artificial intelligence is becoming more and more common in the educational environment, providing
students
Use synonyms
 with questions and detailed answers.
Technology
Use synonyms
 is a support for teachers, but it will never provide the same input as teachers themselves. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
technology
Use synonyms
 is beneficial, I do not believe that a computer can teach
as well as
Linking Words
 a teacher can.
Submitted by lesniak893 on

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Supported Main Points
Enhance the support for your main points with more specific examples or studies to strengthen the argument.
Relevant Specific Examples
Refine the examples provided to ensure they are specific and directly related to the point being made, such as more detailed evidence regarding the decline in education quality during the pandemic.
Logical Structure
The essay maintains a clear structure with a logical flow from introduction to conclusion.
Introduction and Conclusion
The introduction clearly states the essay's position, and the conclusion succinctly summarizes the main argument.
Task Achievement
The essay addresses the task effectively by discussing potential drawbacks of replacing teachers with computers, providing a balanced view that acknowledges the role of technology.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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