IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Wedding are more expensive in many country comparison present and past. What is the reason behind this? Is this a positive or negative development?

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People
Use synonyms
have
Verb problem
pay
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 more attention towards showing the committee that they are having a big ceremony,
marriage
Correct word choice
and marriage
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are
Change the verb form
is
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 quite expensive in most
of
Change preposition
apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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countries than they were used to be in the past. I believe
this
Linking Words
 train will have on negative development as they will have to carry a
burden
Use synonyms
 of
Use synonyms
loan
Fix the agreement mistake
loans
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also
Linking Words
 disturbance to the neighbours.
To begin
Linking Words
with
Add a comma
with,
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 the most prominent reason, having
expensive
Correct article usage
an expensive
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 wedding means taking a huge
burden
Use synonyms
 of
loan
Use synonyms
 which will not give the
marriage
Replace the word
married
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 couple to have a peaceful night. They have to make a plan to return the depth on time
otherwise
Linking Words
 they will have to face the penalty.
For example
Linking Words
: in a please community
people
Use synonyms
 often lops to throw a huge party but after the
party
Add a comma
party,
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 they will have a
burden
Use synonyms
 of
Use synonyms
loan
Fix the agreement mistake
loans
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 on their
head
Fix the agreement mistake
heads
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 and suffer throughout
the
Change the word
their
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life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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 to make a payment for
a
Correct article usage
apply
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poor
people
Use synonyms
.
Additionally
Linking Words
, there is a trend of playing music loudly
also
Linking Words
 with a band which will affect the peace of the
people
Use synonyms
 living nearby. It often
cause
Change the verb form
causes
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 sound pollution in the city with
such
Linking Words
 marriage.
For instance
Linking Words
:
people
Use synonyms
 living near
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Remove the article
apply
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Mary's
hall
Capitalize word
Hall
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 often
complaints
Replace the word
complain
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 about the sound that often comes from the hall, disturbing them. In conclusion, there
maybe
Correct your spelling
may be
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other positive aspect
Change the wording
another positive aspect
other positive aspects
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 of expensive weddings,
the
Correct word choice
but the
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 negative
aspect
Fix the agreement mistake
aspects
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 are more significant as
person
Add an article
a person
the person
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 have to suffer from a shortage of cash for a certain period of time.
Also
Linking Words
, have to take
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
burden
Use synonyms
 of
Use synonyms
loan
Fix the agreement mistake
loans
show examples
 in their head.
Additionally
Linking Words
, polluting the environment hampers the lives of
people
Use synonyms
 living near
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the halls.

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coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which is good. However, make sure each paragraph supports the main idea clearly.
task achievement
Try to make sure each argument is fully developed. For instance, when mentioning noise pollution, elaborate on why this is a serious issue and its broader impact.
task achievement
Engaging with the topic and providing examples shows a good understanding of the issue.
coherence cohesion
The introduction clearly presents the topic and your opinion, setting up the essay well.
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