Some people think a high salary is important when choosing a company to work for, while others argue that a good working atmosphere is more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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this

Linking Words

era, having a job becomes an essential basic for every

individuals

Change to a singular noun

individual

show examples

. More and more

people

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selecting a company to

work

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for in it because of the high

salary

Use synonyms

Others

Correct quantifier usage

Other

show examples

persons believe that a nice working environment is more important than others view. Personally,

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show examples

think that both ideas are equally interesting. On the one hand, it is believed by some

people

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that

get

Wrong verb form

getting

show examples

Remove the article

apply

show examples

high money is

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apply

show examples

better than

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

air

working

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work

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. In fact, most employees

work

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in hard environments to get

Use synonyms

salary

Add an article

a salary

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,so no matter

for

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apply

show examples

them

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

if the air is boring or noisy.

In addition

Linking Words

, they prefer to

work

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for

long

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a long

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time even if they are tired or

un relaxed

Correct your spelling

unrelaxed

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because the money will give them what they ever want. For

examples

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example

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, after that anxiety atmosphere

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

money will bring happiness to those

people

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by providing essential needs like food, clothes, and a dream home.

As a result

Linking Words

, in

there

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their

show examples

perspective's

Unnecessary verb

perspective

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the rise

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show examples

salary

Use synonyms

is more important.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, there are some

people

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who

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are in

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love with the idea of working in

atmosphere

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an atmosphere

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which makes them

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apply

show examples

feel good.

Furthermore

Linking Words

good

Correct article usage

a good

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environment can help the employees to achieve and finish their tasks in

short

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a short

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time. What I mean,

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is if

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the

managers

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manager

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is always angry and

shout

Correct subject-verb agreement

shouts

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in front of his employees so, the air will be full of anxiety and feeling bad which makes their minds

losses

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lose

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. Maybe they

thinks

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think

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about different things

have

Verb problem

that are

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not related to

work

Use synonyms

. A study published in New York in 2013, concluded that 90% of

people

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who

work

Use synonyms

in a

relax

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relaxed

show examples

place are more likely to

happy

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be happy

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and givers in their job. In Conclusion, a lot of

people

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who

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

believe that the

roses

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rose's

roses'

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salary

Use synonyms

is more

much

Fix the agreement mistake

apply

show examples

important than

others

Correct quantifier usage

other

show examples

Use synonyms

people

Change noun form

people's

show examples

perspective which

is argue

Change the verb form

argues

show examples

that

the a

Choose an article

the

show examples

nice place is more important than. In my

opinion

Add a comma

opinion,

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I believe that both views have it is bright side and it is dark side.

1997atika1997Tue Jan 14 2025

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coherence cohesion

Work on maintaining a clear and logical structure throughout the essay. Each paragraph should have a clear main point and supporting details.

coherence cohesion

Try using more cohesive devices like transition words and phrases to link sentences and paragraphs effectively.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that all main points are well-supported with specific examples or explanations.

task achievement

Stick to one idea per paragraph and explore it fully before moving to the next.

task achievement

Make sure to use specific examples that enhance your points and relate to your personal experience or wider knowledge.

coherence cohesion

The essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, which is essential for good structure.

task achievement

You have addressed both sides of the argument, which shows a balanced approach to the task.

task achievement

It is positive that you included a study example, which adds credibility to your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
39
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

8 paragraphs

322 words

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Some people think a high salary is important when choosing a company to work for, while others argue that a good working atmosphere is more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Fully explain your ideas

In many parts of the world, it is common for one parent to stay at home and raise a new born child while other works full time to earn money. Do advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

The rise of social media has affected personal relationships and society as a whole. Do the advantages of using social media for communication outweigh the disadvantage

Should the government fund the education and healthcare system? What is your opinion?

In many countries, people are choosing to have children at a later age. Some people believe this trend has negative effects on both the government and families. What is your opinion? Use knowledge and experience to support your answer.