Some people think a high salary is important when choosing a company to work for, while others argue that a good working atmosphere is more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
In
this
era, having a job becomes an essential basic for every Linking Words
individuals
. More and more Change to a singular noun
individual
people
selecting a company to Use synonyms
work
for in it because of the high Use synonyms
salary
.Use synonyms
Others
persons believe that a nice working environment is more important than others view.
Personally, Correct quantifier usage
Other
i
think that both ideas are equally interesting.
On the one hand, it is believed by some Change the capitalization
I
people
that Use synonyms
get
Wrong verb form
getting
a
high money is Remove the article
apply
more
better than Change the word
apply
the
air Correct article usage
apply
working
. In fact, most employees Replace the word
work
work
in hard environments to get Use synonyms
Use synonyms
salary
,so no matter Add an article
a salary
for
Change preposition
apply
them
if the air is boring or noisy. Correct pronoun usage
apply
In addition
, they prefer to Linking Words
work
for Use synonyms
long
time even if they are tired or Change the article
a long
un relaxed
because the money will give them what they ever want. For Correct your spelling
unrelaxed
examples
, after that anxiety atmosphere Fix the agreement mistake
example
the
money will bring happiness to those Correct article usage
apply
people
by providing essential needs like food, clothes, and a dream home.Use synonyms
As a result
, in Linking Words
there
Replace the word
their
perspective's
the rise Unnecessary verb
perspective
of
Change preposition
in
salary
is more important.
Use synonyms
On the other hand
, there are some Linking Words
people
who Use synonyms
in
love with the idea of working in Add a missing verb
are in
atmosphere
which makes them Add an article
an atmosphere
to
feel good.
Change the verb form
apply
Furthermore
, Linking Words
good
environment can help the employees to achieve and finish their tasks in Correct article usage
a good
short
time. What I mean, Add an article
a short
if
the Add a missing verb
is if
managers
is always angry and Fix the agreement mistake
manager
shout
in front of his employees so, the air will be full of anxiety and feeling bad which makes their minds Correct subject-verb agreement
shouts
losses
.
Maybe they Replace the word
lose
thinks
about different things Change the verb form
think
have
not related to Verb problem
that are
work
.
A study published in New York in 2013, concluded that 90% of Use synonyms
people
who Use synonyms
work
in a Use synonyms
relax
place are more likely to Replace the word
relaxed
happy
and givers in their job.
In Conclusion, a lot of Add a missing verb
be happy
people
Use synonyms
who
believe that the Correct pronoun usage
apply
roses
Change noun form
rose's
roses'
salary
is more Use synonyms
much
important than Fix the agreement mistake
apply
others
Correct quantifier usage
other
Use synonyms
people
perspective which Change noun form
people's
is argue
that Change the verb form
argues
the a
nice place is more important than. In my Choose an article
the
a
opinion
I believe that both views have it is bright side and it is dark side.Add a comma
opinion,
Submitted by 1997atika1997 on
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coherence cohesion
Work on maintaining a clear and logical structure throughout the essay. Each paragraph should have a clear main point and supporting details.
coherence cohesion
Try using more cohesive devices like transition words and phrases to link sentences and paragraphs effectively.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that all main points are well-supported with specific examples or explanations.
task achievement
Stick to one idea per paragraph and explore it fully before moving to the next.
task achievement
Make sure to use specific examples that enhance your points and relate to your personal experience or wider knowledge.
coherence cohesion
The essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, which is essential for good structure.
task achievement
You have addressed both sides of the argument, which shows a balanced approach to the task.
task achievement
It is positive that you included a study example, which adds credibility to your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.