IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

The best way to reduce emissions from vehicles is to impose a higer tax on vehicles which use a lot of fuel and lower tax on those that don't. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#emissions #vehicles #higer #tax #fuel
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The most effective way in order
reducing
Wrong verb form
reduce
show examples
 pollution
due to
Linking Words
transportation's
Change noun form
transportation
show examples
 discards is to impose a higher tax on several
kind
Change to a plural noun
kinds
show examples
 of
Use synonyms
vehicle
Fix the agreement mistake
vehicles
show examples
 which
use
Use synonyms
 a lot of fuel and
lower
Correct article usage
a lower
show examples
 tax on
Use synonyms
vehicle
Fix the agreement mistake
vehicles
show examples
 which do not
use
Use synonyms
 a lot of fuel. I agree
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
 that idea because
vehicles
Use synonyms
 that
use
Use synonyms
 a lot of fuel usually are
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
older and produce more pollution than the newer
Use synonyms
one
Correct pronoun usage
ones
show examples
. The concept of green living nowadays has more impact
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
people
Use synonyms
's
live
Replace the word
lives
show examples
. The unpredictable weather changes between
season
Fix the agreement mistake
seasons
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 has become more real and
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
people
Use synonyms
's awareness immediately. In modern living,
people
Use synonyms
 get used to
live
Change the verb form
living
show examples
 side by side daily with
Add an article
the machine
a machine
show examples
machine
Fix the agreement mistake
machines
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;
Use synonyms
vehicle
Add an article
the vehicle
a vehicle
show examples
 is
one
Use synonyms
 of
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
. We prefer to
use
Use synonyms
 modern transportation and own even more than
one
Use synonyms
 kind of
vehicle
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as
motorcycle
Correct article usage
a motorcycle
show examples
and
Correct word choice
or
show examples
 car. Governments should interfere in
this
Linking Words
 area
due to
Linking Words
 the impact of
Use synonyms
vehicle
Fix the agreement mistake
vehicles
show examples
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
quality
Correct article usage
the quality
show examples
 of
air
Add an article
the air
show examples
 we
breath
Replace the word
breathe
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. If the older
vehicles
Use synonyms
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 taxed
with
Change preposition
at
show examples
 higher rates,
people
Use synonyms
 will coordinate and rethinking not to change into the newer
vehicles
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
 the idea of higher tax is
drive
Wrong verb form
driving
show examples
consuments
Correct your spelling
consumers
 to buy a newer
vehicle
Use synonyms
, the
producents
Correct your spelling
producers
show examples
 of
vehicles
Use synonyms
is
Change the verb form
also need
show examples
also
Linking Words
 need to be encouraged to provide and sell modern
vehicles
Use synonyms
 which
supports
Correct subject-verb agreement
support
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
green living. Not only using electric cars and
motorcycle
Fix the agreement mistake
motorcycles
show examples
 but
also
Linking Words
 hybrid
vehicles
Use synonyms
 might be
one
Use synonyms
 type of solution to diminish the air pollution in the world.
Submitted by marchahumardani on

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task achievement
Ensure that your essay directly addresses all parts of the task. While the essay presents arguments in favor of higher taxes for older vehicles, it could benefit from a direct exploration of any potential negative effects or counterarguments related to this approach.
coherence cohesion
Consider organizing your ideas more clearly to improve the logical flow of the essay. Each paragraph should focus on a single main point and transition smoothly to the next.
coherence cohesion
Strengthen the introduction and conclusion by summarizing key points and clearly stating your position. The current conclusion could be more assertive about your perspective.
task achievement
Use more specific examples or evidence to support your points. For instance, providing data or specific cases about vehicle emissions statistics could strengthen the essay.
task achievement
The essay demonstrates a clear stance, supporting the idea of varying taxes based on vehicle fuel usage and pollution contribution.
task achievement
Main arguments are supported with some reasoning, such as the environmental impact of older vehicles compared to newer models.
task achievement
The essay indicates awareness of broader environmental issues, emphasizing the concept of 'green living'.
task achievement
Uses some varied vocabulary, such as 'green living', 'unpredictable weather changes', and 'hybrid vehicles'.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • emissions reduction
  • fuel-efficient vehicles
  • incentivize
  • consumer preferences
  • green vehicles
  • economic impact
  • low-income individuals
  • subsidies
  • supportive measures
  • equity
  • alternative measures
  • public transportation
  • carpooling
  • infrastructure
  • electric vehicles
  • vehicle manufacturing
  • innovations
  • hybrid vehicles
  • environmental benefits
  • carbon footprint
What to do next:
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