Some people say success in a person’s life as an adult is the result of the way he was brought up by his parents. Do you agree or disagree?

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There is no denying the fact that
parents
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play a crucial role in their
children
Use synonyms
's success.
While
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it is a commonly held belief that
mother
Correct article usage
a mother
show examples
and
father
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father's
show examples
success
lives
Verb problem
apply
show examples
influence
Correct subject-verb agreement
influences
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in
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apply
show examples
their
child
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's life, there is
also
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an argument that opposes it. In my opinion, I consider that
parents
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affect
kids
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kids'
kid's
show examples
lives.
To begin
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with, both of the
parents
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are working hard to secure their
child
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's future.
In other words
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, they provide financial resources for their
child
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's educational quality and high standards in schools, which can be set as foundations of success way.
In addition
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,
parents
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teach their
children
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many things,
such
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as motivation, determination, and different types of skills.
For example
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,
according to
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King Ali University, all successful people learn plenty of things from their families. Another point to consider is that
parents
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help their
children
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to choose their field in university. It is
also
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possible to say that
children
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are influenced by their
families
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family's
families'
show examples
careers and want to be like them,
such
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as actors' kids; the majority of them want to be famous like their mother or father, like
celebrity
Correct article usage
the celebrity
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Ali, who is a famous actor,
such
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as his father, Ahmed.
Moreover
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, some
children
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want to achieve their
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parents
Change noun form
parent's
parents'
show examples
dream.
For instance
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, I went to medical school for three years
due to
Linking Words
my mom wanting me to be a doctor in the future, and I worked in it. In conclusion, despite people having different views, I believe that a
child
Use synonyms
's successful life is a result of their family working hard and
good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
upbringing
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
their
child
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by mnm_234 on

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coherence cohesion
Work on refining the logical structure in your essay. While the main points are clear, connecting them with more explicit linking phrases would enhance the flow and make your argument more compelling.
task achievement
You might consider diversifying your examples to include a range of influences beyond family that affect success, such as education, peers, or personal effort. This would provide a more comprehensive view and strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
You've successfully included a clear introduction and conclusion that effectively set the context and summarize your argument.
task achievement
The essay clearly states your opinion and supports it with examples, demonstrating a clear understanding of the task.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • upbringing
  • nurturing
  • discipline
  • emotional support
  • role modeling
  • socioeconomic status
  • resilience
  • determinism
  • aspirations
  • self-esteem
  • confidence
  • educational opportunities
  • personal choices
  • influences
  • financial resources
  • success
  • development
  • initiative
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