Some people think that the teenagers should concentrate on all subjects at school. Others believe that teenagers should focus on the subject they are best at or they are most interested in. To what extent do you agree?
Some people believe that it would be better if adolescents focused on the
subjects
they are most keen on, Use synonyms
whereas
others reckon that Linking Words
students
have to concentrate on every subject. In my opinion, Use synonyms
teenagers
ought to dedicate their time to all Use synonyms
subjects
equally, since it allows them to be versatile and educated in every field. Use synonyms
Moreover
, Linking Words
teenagers
are known for their excessive emotions and changing moods, so if they study only particular Use synonyms
subjects
it can turn into a problem when they are willing to change their educational direction.
Use synonyms
Firstly
, the modern and globalized world requires knowledge from almost every field. Average Linking Words
students
after school should have basic knowledge of math, history, languages, biology and geography. Without proper knowledge in each of the school Use synonyms
subjects
, Use synonyms
students
might face problems in the future especially in the workplace or at the universities. Being an educated and versatile Use synonyms
student
is no more an option, but an obligation. Use synonyms
Therefore
, focusing on all school Linking Words
subjects
allows Use synonyms
students
to be competitive persons who are prepared for the challenges of the modern world.
Use synonyms
Secondly
, Linking Words
teenagers
' decision-making and desires are usually unstable, and allowing them to choose what kind of fields they want to study will cause problems in the long term. Use synonyms
For instance
, Linking Words
student
"A" is good at math, Use synonyms
however
, his preferences Linking Words
change
in two years, and now he wants to apply for a history major at the university. In Wrong verb form
changed
this
scenario, if Linking Words
student
"A" learnt only math, he would face hardships in terms of changing the direction. Use synonyms
However
, in the status quo, Linking Words
student
"A" dedicated equal time and put enough effort into both Use synonyms
subjects
, Use synonyms
therefore
he successfully Linking Words
implements
his wishes into reality.
In conclusion, Wrong verb form
implemented
students
Use synonyms
that
focus on all Correct pronoun usage
who
subjects
are more prepared for the competition in the future since they are more educated and versatile. Use synonyms
Also
, Linking Words
teenagers
might wish to change their field of study, and focusing on a particular subject might bring challenges in the future, especially when adolescents Use synonyms
will
enrol at universities.Verb problem
apply
Submitted by akylov.a on
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Task Achievement
To strengthen the argument, provide additional specific examples or data that support the idea of studying all subjects. This will help to illustrate how being versatile in different fields benefits students.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. Even though the essay is logically structured, some transitions could be made more seamless to guide the reader through the argument more effectively.
Task Achievement
Consider countering the argument with potential downsides of studying all subjects, and then refute them, to demonstrate critical thinking and a balanced perspective.
Task Achievement
Your essay presents a strong and relevant argument, making a solid case for why students should focus on all subjects rather than a select few.
Coherence and Cohesion
The logical structure of your essay is commendable. Each point builds on the previous one, reinforcing your main thesis.
Coherence and Cohesion
The introduction and conclusion effectively summarize and close your argument, providing a clear stance on the topic.