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Writing Samples
Band 7

Nowadays, many people choose to be self-employed rather than work with a company or organization. What might be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

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Many individuals choose to work at home rather than under someone.
This
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 could be for several reasons, which will be discussed. Working as an individual and not being stressed all the
time
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 could be liberating.
Furthermore
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, people deciding to be employed under themselves could be because of several issues. One of the reasons is that operating under a company can be very physically demanding,
for example
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, workers are put under a lot of pressure by their employers by having a
time
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 limit to submit certain projects.
Although
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 it is profitable for the organization, the staff some of the times are underpaid. Another explanation is that workplaces are sometimes unfit for them causing them to have an uncomfortable
time
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 at their office. These are just a few reasons why they choose to be self-employed. The benefits of doing that can range from flexible working hours, a salary
that is
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 on point, having
time
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 to spend with family, and more.
However
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, there are disadvantages to
this
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 practice. Having your own business or organization can be very difficult. To succeed there have to be many failures, some even go bankrupt and realize that it may not be a good choice. To explain
further
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, not all independent people do well in being their boss. In summary, there are downsides to being self-employed.
However
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, if one is organized and consistent they may succeed. To own a successful business there may be some challenges along
their
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the
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 pathway. But having a good mentor, and realizing many of your skills might be useful.

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Task Achievement
The essay presents a general response to the task prompt but lacks depth in the exploration of reasons for self-employment and its disadvantages. Consider developing your points further with specific examples and thorough explanations to enhance clarity and engagement.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay structure is clear with an introduction and conclusion, but the logical flow between paragraphs can be strengthened for better cohesion. Transitional phrases between ideas will help create a seamless reading experience.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay maintains a clear structure with an identifiable introduction and conclusion, summarizing the main points effectively.
Task Achievement
The main ideas are presented in a simplistic manner, providing a basic understanding of the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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