The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. Do you agree or disagree?

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Nowsday
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Newsday
Nowadays

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, it is often argued that
employee
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employees

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should have more leisure time on
weekend
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weekends

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and short
period
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periods

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on
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of

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work. As far as
i
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I

The pronoun I should always be capitalized.

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am concerned, I strongly agree with
this
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opinion and think work-life balance is much more
efficency
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efficient

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than long-period work , which will reveal in the following paragraph. First of all, I believe that
For example
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, not because of , but because s+v+o
Secondly
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, v.ing
In other words
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, there is a strong benefit between and
For instance
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,
Thus
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
advantages
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the advantages

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of balancing in
worklife
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life

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outweigh the
drawback
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drawbacks

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of industrious working in a long-term perspective.
To sum up
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, I completely believe that is more
benificial
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beneficial

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than because it makes balancing and
resilence
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resilience

The word resilence doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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for human
being
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beings

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.

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task achievement
Ensure you answer the question completely, providing reasons for your stance on a shorter working week and longer weekend.
task achievement
Develop the ideas more clearly to cover all aspects of the prompt. Enhance clarity by avoiding unfinished sentences and vague expressions.
task achievement
Include specific examples to support your points, which will help in strengthening the argument.
coherence cohesion
Work on the logical flow of your essay. Ensure each paragraph conveys a clear idea that contributes to your overall argument. Complete any unfinished thoughts or sentences to enhance communication.
coherence cohesion
Reinforce connections between ideas through transitional words or phrases to improve the essay's cohesion.
task achievement
You have expressed a clear opinion, which is a good starting point for your response.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion indicate the writer's perspective and attempt to summarize the arguments.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • productivity
  • burnout
  • motivation
  • mental well-being
  • work-life balance
  • job satisfaction
  • pollution levels
  • traffic congestion
  • consumer spending
  • economic implications
  • leisure and service sectors
What to do next:
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