IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The graph below shows the average carbon dioxide (CO2) emissions per person in the United Kingdom, Swedon, Italy, and Portugal between 1967 and 2007

The graph below shows the average carbon dioxide (CO2) emissions per person in the United Kingdom, Swedon, Italy, and Portugal between 1967 and 2007
#carbon #dioxide #co #emissions #person #kingdom #swedon
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The first chart given represents
use
Add an article
the use
show examples
 of
energy
Use synonyms
 in an average Australian household.Another chart demonstrates emissions of
gas
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
 using
this
Linking Words
energy
Use synonyms
. It is evident that trends in both pie
charts
Add a verb
charts are
charts were
show examples
 almost equivalent,
Linking Words
however
Add a comma
however,
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 percentages of heating process and other appliances have changed.
Energy
Use synonyms
 consumption
of
Change preposition
from
show examples
a
Remove the article
apply
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heating
occupy
Change the verb form
occupies
show examples
 more than
one third
Add a hyphen
one-third
show examples
 of
overall
Linking Words
 consumption, exactly 42
Use synonyms
percents
Fix the agreement mistake
percent
show examples
,
while
Linking Words
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
gas
Use synonyms
 emissions heating
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
 up 15
Use synonyms
percents
Fix the agreement mistake
percent
show examples
.
Cooling
Correct article usage
The cooling
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 process
draw
Change the verb form
draws
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 up only 2
Use synonyms
percents
Fix the agreement mistake
percent
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 of
energy
Use synonyms
us
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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,
Linking Words
also
Correct word choice
and also
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form
Correct subject-verb agreement
forms
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 the minimum amount of
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
gas
Use synonyms
emmisions
Correct your spelling
emissions
 among other processes,approximately 3
Use synonyms
percents
Fix the agreement mistake
percent
show examples
.
Water
Correct article usage
The water
show examples
 heating process composes nearly the same proportions in both charts, namely 30
Use synonyms
percents
Fix the agreement mistake
percent
show examples
 in
energy
Use synonyms
 consumption and 32
Use synonyms
percents
Fix the agreement mistake
percent
show examples
 in
gas
Use synonyms
 waste.
Difference
Correct article usage
The difference
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of
Change preposition
in
show examples
use
Correct article usage
the use
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 of
energy
Use synonyms
 and
gas
Use synonyms
 emissions of other appliances
almost
Add a missing verb
is almost
show examples
 two times,15
Use synonyms
percents
Fix the agreement mistake
percent
show examples
 against 28
Use synonyms
percents
Fix the agreement mistake
percent
show examples
.
Submitted by dnm.best on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words energy, gas, percents with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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