Holding international games such as olympics is an exciting event. Some people think that it has positive effect, while others argue that it is a waste of money. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

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Olympics
Correct article usage
The Olympics
show examples
is the pinnacle of sports and it is an honour to host the
event
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
some believe it to be an amazing
event
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, few are of the opinion that it is money down the drain,
i
Change the capitalization
I
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am with the notion that it is a wonderful chance to do a lot of positive things at the same time.
To begin
Linking Words
with, the opportunity to host the Olympic
games
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comes after every four years, a tradition
began
Correct pronoun usage
that began
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in the 18th century
,
Remove the comma
apply
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when the best player from around the world competed with each other for a chance to win the gold medal for their country. Hosting
such
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an
event
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can boost
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
tourism for that city,
for instance
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in 2024 Paris hosted the
games
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, and their GDP had a spite in growth
due to
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the increase in tourism,
also
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it is a chance to show the entire world the ability of a nation to host
this
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kind of
event
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. to add to
this
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, the popularity of the city increased drastically, which is good for local
buiseness
Correct your spelling
business
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, most of the stadiums that are constructed for the purpose of spectating these
games
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, are only used during the time of Olympics and are often empty during the year, and to be able to carry out certain
games
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such
Linking Words
as a marathon and
triathlon
Fix the agreement mistake
triathlons
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many public roads are closed and
this
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can be a hassle for the local residents,
furthermore
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due to
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the increase of tourists most of the places are crowded
also
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people are loitering and causing damage to the public properties. In conclusion,
while
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there can be some nuisance
due to
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the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
overcrowding, there are many advantages
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
hosting
such
Linking Words
events as it generates enough revenue to boost the economy.
Submitted by bhat.shweta17 on

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Task Achievement
Try to elaborate more on both sides of the argument with clearer examples and explanations.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on the flow of the essay to make it more logically structured. Linking words can help improve the flow between sentences and ideas.
Task Achievement
Some points in the essay are underdeveloped. Use specific and detailed examples to support your main ideas.
General
Take care of grammatical errors and punctuation to ensure clarity in your writing.
Task Achievement
The essay includes both positive and negative points regarding the topic, which is vital for a balanced discussion.
Coherence and Cohesion
An introduction and conclusion are present, providing a clear framework for the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • economic boost
  • tourism revenue
  • global visibility
  • prestige
  • lasting legacy
  • infrastructure
  • facilities
  • investment
  • security
  • logistics
  • heavily strain
  • underused
  • social costs
  • displacement
  • opportunity cost
  • public funds
  • essential sectors
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