IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

You are a member of a local sports club. Recently, the club has introduced new rules that you are unhappy with. Write a letter to the club manager. In your letter: explain why you are unhappy with the new rules describe how these rules are affecting you and other members suggest what the club should do instead

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Dear Mr. Bank, I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to express my disappointment regarding
latest
Correct article usage
the latest
show examples
 criteria
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 the sports club.
Firstly
Linking Words
, I saw on the website that the timing for the evening match was from 5pm to 7pm about from 6pm to 8pm. But
this
Linking Words
 time will create
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
problems for all active participants including me. Almost everyone's office
timing
Replace the word
time
show examples
 is 5pm in the evening and we will not
able
Add a missing verb
be able
show examples
 to take part in
this
Linking Words
 particular game.
Additionally
Linking Words
, the sports club activities are helping us to stay healthy, but
this
Linking Words
 new rule will directly affect us
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
due to
Linking Words
 professional commitments we are not able to reach
at
Change preposition
on
show examples
 time.
Moreover
Linking Words
, all other members have the same issue
of
Change preposition
with
show examples
 the new timing.
Lastly
Linking Words
, I would like to request you on behalf of all the participants that kindly change the time and set
this
Linking Words
 as the old one was. If you are not able to do the same, at least do
this
Linking Words
 5:30pm, so we can try to reach there. I am looking forward
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 a positive response. Yours Sincerely, Priyanka

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure clear paragraphing with a single idea in each paragraph for better readability. Consider shortening sentences for clarity.
Task Achievement
Offer specific examples to support why the time change affects daily routines so significantly.
Greeting and Closing
Provide a more formal salutation and closing in line with professional correspondence.
Task Achievement
The letter addresses all parts of the task, explaining dissatisfaction, describing effects, and suggesting a solution.
Suitable Writing Tone
The tone is polite and constructive, maintaining professional language suitable for a formal letter.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: