IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Vaping products should be totally banned in Ireland, Do you agree or disagree to this statement? Explain your answer

Vaping products
has
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have
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 become popular in the
last
Linking Words
 decade, and it has been a controversial
discussing
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discussion
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 about whether
banning
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to ban
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it
Correct pronoun usage
them
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 or not. In my
opinion
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opinion,
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 I think vaping, just like smoking, should be a personal choice but with some restrictions and clarifications. Vaping, with its fancy flavours and smells, spread
between
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among
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 youths, which is in my opinion, the main reason why it should
have
Verb problem
be
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 restricted. Children and teenagers, have not yet
gain
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gained
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 the ability to recognise the possible negative impacts of their actions, so at
this
Linking Words
 period of age, some decisions ought to be controlled by law. In my point of view vaping and any nicotine
consumptions
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consumption
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,
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apply
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 must be one of these actions, as they might seem
as
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like
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 a rewarding habit in the beginning but eventually
ends
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end
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 with a struggle, minors under 21 years old should be banned from trading or using
tobaccos
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tobacco
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 product. Many adults utilize vaping as a way to quit smoking, but many of them are ignorant that vaping is yet not fully understood. A lot of vape chemical compounds
,
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apply
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 are still unknown regarding
to
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apply
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their health’s impact. So
scientist
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scientists
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 are not yet fully sure whether vaping is
healthier
Add an article
a healthier
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 alternative to regular smoking or not. So I would consider finding a way to educate
the
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apply
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society about the reality
about
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of
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 what we know
,
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apply
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 and emphasizing better ways to quit smoking via therapy or any similar ways. In conclusion, all tobacco
product
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products
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 should be prohibited from minors under 21, and clarifications should be applied for adults who use vaping or consider to use it.

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task achievement
Ensure that all points are supported by specific, relevant examples or evidence.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving the logical structure by connecting ideas more smoothly between paragraphs.
introduction conclusion present
The essay begins with a clear introduction and ends with a succinct conclusion, outlining the writer’s stance on the topic.
task achievement
The essay addresses a significant aspect of the vaping debate, particularly focusing on youth and the need for restrictions.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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