IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think that the main benefit of international cooperation is in the protection of the environment, while others believe that businesses mainly benefit. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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There is a debate
of
Change preposition
about
show examples
major
Correct article usage
the major
show examples
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
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 of corporating worldwide. Some individuals think
primary
Add an article
the primary
show examples
 advantage of it is keeping
environment
Correct article usage
the environment
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safely
Change the word
safe
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,
while
Linking Words
 others believe that
business
Use synonyms
 is
main
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the main
show examples
 purpose.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss both views in detail and put forward why
business
Use synonyms
 is
urgent
Correct article usage
an urgent
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 point. Nowadays the condition of the world
have
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has
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 changed significantly.
There
Change the word
It
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 is said," Cat does not go under the sun for free". Today even, sun meet with his father if there is any benefit. When it comes to big corporations
such
Linking Words
 as
World
Correct article usage
the World
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trade organization
Correct your spelling
Trade Organization
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 and Oil Producing and Exporting Countries(OPEC), there can be seen the exact purpose of
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these
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 unions.
First
Correct article usage
The first
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 one,
for example
Linking Words
,
regulate
Change the verb form
regulates
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 the policy of trade and
strengthen
Correct subject-verb agreement
strengthens
show examples
 the connection of states in trending
system
Fix the agreement mistake
systems
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 worldwide. The second
work
Fix the agreement mistake
works
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 with countries which produce oil and need oil, linking each other with
this
Linking Words
business
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
all
Add a missing verb
is all
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 about financial institutions which make
world
Add an article
the world
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 a great
business
Use synonyms
 area. The second part of people put forward their ideas noticing some
well known
Add a hyphen
well-known
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 worldwide cooperation sectors like
United
Correct article usage
the United
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 Nations Environment Programme(UNEP).
This
Linking Words
 is an organization working nationally and internationally to protect the environment and promote sustainable development.
There
Correct pronoun usage
It
show examples
 can be seen from the news that meetings of
such
Linking Words
 organizations are held every month
discussing
Change the verb form
to discuss
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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problems like pollution and desertification around the globe and seeking
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sollution
Correct your spelling
solutions
 for them. On top of
this
Linking Words
,
previous
Correct article usage
the previous
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 year, in Tianjin, one of the
costal
Correct your spelling
coastal
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 cities of China, people were suffering from the huge amount
garbage
Change preposition
of garbage
show examples
 on
their
Change the word
the
show examples
 sea becoming unable to
their
Add a missing verb
do their
show examples
business
Use synonyms
, fishing. When the news spread online, UNEP, in cooperation with China, contributed by imposing strict laws against the discharge of
garbages
Correct subject-verb agreement
garbage
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 into the river. In summary,
this
Linking Words
 essay discussed two sides and
wile
Correct your spelling
while
show examples
 some organizations look
as
Change preposition
at
show examples
 working hard in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
environmental improvement they
all
Add a missing verb
are all
show examples
 connected with the purpose of financial benefits.

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Task Response
Work on clearly stating your position in the introduction and conclusion. This will help you provide a stronger argument and structure to your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a single clear idea and that this idea is supported with more specific examples and details.
Structure
Your essay introduces the topic well and provides a clear structure with distinct paragraphs for different views.
Relevant Examples
You have provided specific examples, such as UNEP and OPEC, which help illustrate the points you are discussing.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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