IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Many people believe that formal "pen and paper" examinations are not the best method of assessing educational achievement. Discuss this view and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some people believe that the traditional method of learning by pen and paper is not the best way to improve educational level nowadays. From my
perspectives
Fix the agreement mistake
perspective
show examples
, I agree with their view
due to
Linking Words
 the variety of other available learning methods.
For example
Linking Words
, teaching by technology and practical learning. Individuals believe that examining students by pen and paper is not the best method for learning, and
its
Correct your spelling
it's
show examples
 better to use other tools like
techlogical
Correct your spelling
technological
 devices. With the advancement of
technology
Add a comma
technology,
show examples
 a lot of learning apps and websites have been created to make learning more fun and easier.
For instance
Linking Words
,
kahoot
Change the capitalization
Kahoot
show examples
 is a website where
teacher
Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
show examples
 can design games related to the topics they teach the students.
Therefor
Correct your spelling
Therefore
show examples
, it will be easier to deliver the information to the class.
In addition
Linking Words
, practical learning is another effective way to gain knowledge and
being
Wrong verb form
be
show examples
 examined.
As it
Correct word choice
It
show examples
 is known that it is easier to understand a piece of information if it
happen
Change the verb form
happens
show examples
 in front of the students in real life. Especially in science subjects like biology, physics, and chemistry.
For
Linking Words
example
Add a comma
example,
show examples
 in chemical
experiments
Add a comma
experiments,
show examples
 if the student
try
Change the verb form
tries
show examples
 to do it by himself, he will remember it and
consequently
Linking Words
, it will be easier for him to remember it.
To sum up
Linking Words
, I agree with the people who say that the formal way "pen and paper" examinations are not the best method of learning. Since there are better methods to be educated like technical learning and
practice
Wrong verb form
practising
show examples
 the subject in real life.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Try to enhance the continuity between paragraphs. Use linking words to smoothly transition between ideas.
coherence cohesion
Provide a stronger conclusion that summarizes your main points or states a final opinion.
task achievement
Elaborate more on your arguments and provide additional examples to strengthen your points.
task achievement
Ensure that each idea in the paragraphs is clearly linked to the topic sentence.
task achievement
The essay addresses the overall topic and gives examples from personal and academic contexts, enhancing the relevance of your points.
task achievement
Excellent use of technology and practical learning as the main ideas to support your perspective.
coherence cohesion
Good introduction and conclusion, stating your opinion and summarizing the topics discussed.
coherence cohesion
Clear logical structure through separate ideas in paragraphs, allowing for easier understanding.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: